b3ta.com talk

Home » Talk » Archive 13131 (Older | Newer)

this is getting ridiculous
WHERE IS EVERYONE?!

tell me what you're having for lunch, or your weekend plans, or SOMETHING for fuck's sake.

i need information!
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:45, archived)

Fish finger sandwich
No weekend plans sadly. Don't think I'm even doing anything for my birthday.
I've just been summoned to the office. This is either very good, or very bad.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:47, archived)

another one?
you should do something for your birthday, even if it's just a little jig in your new living room
i'm betting on good!
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:49, archived)

The living room isn't quite jig-worthy yet
All my jigging has to be confined to the dining room
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:50, archived)

shame
although i suppose you'd only wear the carpoet out

obviously, that is supposed to say carpet but i like the idea of a wheeled wordsmith
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:10, archived)

Well then good news
The carpet's going.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:10, archived)

And I highly approve of the phrase 'wheeled wordsmith'

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:11, archived)

thanks

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:13, archived)

oh, oh man
fish fingers and sandwich spread sandwiches, with a pot of crab paste to keep me going while the fishfingers are grilling
(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:49, archived)

are you just going to eat the paste with a spoon or have you got something dippable?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:49, archived)

I don't think my spoons fit into those little jars so it might just have to be a crabby finger

(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:58, archived)

would this not be one of those situations where it's ok to lick a knife?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:10, archived)

I might have a ginster's sandwich, prawn cocktail crisps and a coke for lunch
jalfreze or chicken and bacon?
(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:49, archived)

chicken and bacon, i'd say.

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:53, archived)

I didn't know they did bacon flavoured coke

(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:54, archived)

i'd try it once

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:55, archived)

I'd try it once, then forget and try it again
like root beer
(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:04, archived)

how do you feel about sarsaparilla?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:13, archived)

YOU'RE OUT OF YOUR ELEMENT, DONNY.

(

janet aylia proud resident of the fletcher memorial home, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:42, archived)

dust and shattered dreams.
I'm off out now. BYE!!!
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:50, archived)

i bet shattered dreams means something different to me than it does to you

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:13, archived)

:D

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:30, archived)

*nods*

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:40, archived)

ASK ME ANYTHING

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:51, archived)

I hope this finds you well?

(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:51, archived)

Me too

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:52, archived)

Good question

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:53, archived)

why?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:53, archived)

Because I'm dead good

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:58, archived)

how do you know that?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:08, archived)

Mummy says so

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:24, archived)

she says a lot of things

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:26, archived)

This morning we've been emailing each other about semi colons
It's been dead exciting, I love my mum
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:29, archived)

aw, that's quite sweet
i'm waiting to hear back from mine about what she wants for her birthday
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:41, archived)

She wants a signed picture of Edward James Olmos, of course

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:45, archived)

what would you eat crab paste with?

(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:59, archived)

A rustic brown roll, slightly warm

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:00, archived)

from the used side of the reel-to-reel?

(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:04, archived)

DUDE

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:22, archived)

I'd probably spread the paste on the other side, just for ease of use

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:24, archived)

Alright.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:52, archived)

Yes...yes
I see...
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:53, archived)

you've been quiet lately

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:54, archived)

Hopefully working on some new videos tonight and tomorrow
I've finally gotten my mic to work with my new pc so I can do more spontaneous stuff without having rig up my old, slow, buggy pc.
For lunch, I'm starving, so as it's Friday I'll probably treat myself to a takeaway from Wasabi.
(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:53, archived)

nice one
in an unrelated matter, how many copies of your book have been sold?
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:56, archived)

Some, not many, not few, but some
Not sure actual number
(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:09, archived)

well i'm glad people are buying it
it's good!
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:18, archived)

I tried these Wasabi peas from Tesco yesterday
Really nice
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:58, archived)

probably a £3 meal deal from sainsburys!!!
then I'll go to the newly opened Costa coffee 50 yards from my house!!!!

weekend plans: dunno lol!!! probably tidy up and chill out, play some EVE, PS3, cook stuff!!!

Maybe even do a Big Shop at asda!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11
(

fatpoof, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:55, archived)

fucking hell! that's amazing!!
thanks for sharing!!! you fat poof!!!!

what're you playing on the ps3? i've been playing driver: san francisco and mass effect 2
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:57, archived)

modern warfare 1, 2, WAW and possibly 3 when I buy it
the new Medal Of Honor
Skyrim
Mercenaries 2
Uncharted Drakes Deception
(

fatpoof, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:58, archived)

i want to play the new uncharted very much

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:07, archived)

Oi've comple'ed it yer?
it's bloody great.
(

fatpoof, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:10, archived)

can i have your copy?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:17, archived)

I'm actually kinda getting in Fire Emblem, weirdly.
I hate the characters but it's unique that when they die, they stay dead.
(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:11, archived)

i don't think i can be bothered persevering with it
other games to play
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:19, archived)

What do you do for a living now you're not a gold plated pensioner with your massive taxpayers salary?

(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:11, archived)

BOLOGNESE
maybe in a sandwich. Who knows???!!

I've been quite productive today. Got new answerphone machine, recorded dinohoodie message. Changed sheets. Put washing on. Hung washing out. Dishwasher loaded and on. Chickens tended to. Post received. Hoodies packed. Stuff stuff stuff.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:08, archived)

is the dinohoodie message a dull business one or do you say 'rawr' at any point?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:11, archived)

I had to spell out my email address
I don't know if people would hear "rawr" and understand it, or type in "raw" or "ror" etc. Arr Ay Dubbleyoo Arr.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:13, archived)

Leave a message, after the roar.
RRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAARRRRR!
(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:14, archived)

I also made this really exciting animated gif of the most exciting post I've ever received
i.imgur.com/IyrWp.gif
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:16, archived)

i saw that on twitter
it made me laugh
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:19, archived)

My life is so exciting
all these haberdashery items from the internet
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:20, archived)

Holy moly!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:24, archived)

I have two of
these
I imagine bolognese would be excellent as a filling
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:14, archived)

haha awesome
I have a waffle maker, I don't think it would be quite the same though
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:16, archived)

I don't know....Waffles made of bolognese? Sounds alright to me
Might ruin the iron though
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:17, archived)

I am actually thinking about making cider now.
It's not the first time, but tonight I'm going to the pub and it will be intel gathering as well as the usual booze insertion.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:09, archived)

we're doing homebrew at the moment
it's pretty easy. Not on an industrial scale you understand, but it's pretty cheap to start and get an idea of what's needed.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:12, archived)

What are you homebrewing?
The biggest faff with cider seems to be making a press to squeeze the juice out of the apples. There's some unused paving slabs in the garden that might be helpful but jerry-rigging something together isn't going to be massively simple.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:14, archived)

a beer and a cider
both from kits though.
Get one of these, all you need: www.the-home-brew-shop.co.uk/acatalog/Real_Apple_Cider_Starter_Kit.html
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:19, archived)

Two hundred quid?
Crikey and fuck. Unfortunately I don't really have that kind of money to be throwing around at the moment, so I think a DIY alternative would be my only option.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:22, archived)

Sometimes it's worth it for the hassle tbh
A kit with bucket and pressure vessel will cost you some, then the sugars, cleaner, hose etc.

I guess you'd need a big trough/bucket, with slabs large enough to sit inside but let the juice collect around them. And then a big clamp thing, with a screw. Or a fat friend to sit on top.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:25, archived)

True, but pricing that lot up I'm really struggling to see how it costs £200.
Mostly it's just various receptacles, the sensors are a few quid off Ebay so the only complex bits are the press and the book.

The things I've seen recommended online are just storage boxes with a hole drilled in the bottom, then you apply your pressure with a car jack or a vice or similar.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:30, archived)

the presses are over £100 elsewhere, from the looks of it.
oooh I didn't think of a hole in the bottom. That'd work.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:38, archived)

Sensors???
That's some pretty techie cider making...
(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:41, archived)

Well, I can understand the thermometer.
Not sure why they include a hydrometer. Must be FOR SCIENCE.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:56, archived)

I just mean I'd hardly call them sensors, but I suppose technically they are.
A hydrometer is used to test the specific gravity of beer/cider/wine
(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 13:20, archived)

Or any liquid really.

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 13:31, archived)

That shop is round the corner from me.

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:39, archived)

hah, small world.
We've got a pretty good homebrew shop near my parents', but we've not had time to go there in person.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:41, archived)

That shop had a littler shop nearer me that I've bought kits from, fortunately my dad has all his old Boots stuff when he used to brew.
I really want to start brewing again but I want to do it on a larger and more organised scale, so really I need my own space.
(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:43, archived)

send me a free case when it's done

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:12, archived)

Why don't you send me a free case?

(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:14, archived)

because i'm not making cider
fucking hell, noit. keep up.
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:18, archived)

If anyone wants some of this mead I'm making you cant have any
Love Theoban
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:27, archived)

not even me?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:39, archived)

I'm only making 10 litres of it
And you're far away, unless you hop on a boat and pop over, no.
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:39, archived)

you're so selfish

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:42, archived)

I'm eating lunch in my car,
RIGHT NOW!

Chinese chicken sandwich, back of crisps and Rubicon. Oh, and a posh lindt Choco egg.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:43, archived)

Rubicon? The river or the sadly cancelled tv programme?

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:47, archived)

neither,
It's the thirst quenching mango drink with real fruit juice for only 89p.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:49, archived)

alright mr rubicon salesman
I'm sold
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:50, archived)

somewhere an oasis salesmans daughter is being told she can no longer have an 8th birthday party, daddy didn't get his bonus, he was one bottle short :(

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 13:03, archived)

ABUSE OF MOD POWERS. BANOLITH!!!!!!!

(

janet aylia proud resident of the fletcher memorial home, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:48, archived)

HA!
Took you a while.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:59, archived)

i did something wonderful for the lady in my life on her birthday, we will be enjoying it Sunday

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:55, archived)

is it a poo?
i bet it's a poo.
(

janet aylia proud resident of the fletcher memorial home, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 13:04, archived)

Enough of that filthy pig-on-pig action
What does Friday bring you, gentle /talkers?

Alt: If you could be any age, what age would you be? I'd totally be 6. No consequences when you're 6.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:43, archived)

Also
QOTW has already irritated me. I shan't be going there again until the question changes. That is all.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:45, archived)

what happened,
Are you ok?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:45, archived)

I object to people being labelled negatively because they have money
Or that their life is so (comparitively) trouble-free that they only worry about insignificant things. I wish my life were that easy, but it doesn't mean I resent those who have it easier. I could go on, but as I say...it makes me a little cross.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:49, archived)

I just had a look,
I agree with you. But its QOTW, they're generally a bunch of opinionated idiots with little to back up their bogus stories when pushed.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:52, archived)

so very few decent stories anymore.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:53, archived)

i managed to find a couple that made me laugh last week,
But the good ones never make the top of the lists, sometimes I think QOTW is more cliquey than /board.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:55, archived)

it's a conspiracy!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:10, archived)

~~conspiracy~~ MEGABLAST
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:35, archived)

i just looked this up
you're so old
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:27, archived)

:(
It was also the theme tune to a computer game, but I forget which. That's because I'm so very old.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:31, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=mxVb8SO8I3o
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:33, archived)

just for the first 30 seconds or so,
the rest is irrelevant.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:34, archived)

:((

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:35, archived)

xenon or something

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:35, archived)

Ah, that's right
Xenon 2 I believe.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:36, archived)

OMIGOD I freakin' LOVED that game.
Top tune, too.
(

Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:39, archived)

Silence, poor person! *lights cigar with £50 note*
Morning!
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:02, archived)

As long as you worked hard for that £50 note, you can do whatever you want with it
Good morning!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:06, archived)

Does it count if I own the people who earned it?

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:08, archived)

Hey Two Hats
I'd just like you to know that my life is really easy
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:56, archived)

And that's brilliant
And you're entitled to complain about it from time to time.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:04, archived)

No it's fine
My life is pretty sweet, ta
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:28, archived)

Great!
You might want to share this with the miserable, envious, spiteful ingrates of QOTW.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:31, archived)

I do have one First World Problem though Two Hats, which ruins my entire existence
And that's if I take Friday off I have to tip toe around the cleaner and it's quite awkward. Sorry, I've ruined everything now.
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:33, archived)

BOURGEOIS SCUM!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:38, archived)

She keeps on putting the bog roll on the bog roll holder too
I don't like it being there so I take it off when I get home.

It's pretty horrible being me actually
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:38, archived)

bog roll should be mounted on the cistern,
then pulled through between the legs by a second motorised holder at the front of the toilet. It would be like a shit flossing reel-to-reel
(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:16, archived)

I don't see this in my bathroom yet
Get to, I want a patent on my desk by noon
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:17, archived)

Shitty balls

That is all
(

mediocre HONKA HONKA, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 12:01, archived)

they need an alright thread in their lives

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:38, archived)

Yes!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:39, archived)

I've been on there all morning,
and no one's even bothered to call me a cunt.
(

monster munch EAT ME!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:27, archived)

Morning hats.
I'd be 8 so I could bully you.
In fact, I'm going to give you a chinese burn right now.
Imagine that!
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:45, archived)

*sobs*
It's ok...he does that because we're mates...:(
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:47, archived)

I'd be 11 so i could bash you mumps heads together
And push you both in the pond.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:47, archived)

I'm telling mum!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:49, archived)

YOU'RE ADOPTED!

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:54, archived)

:'(

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:57, archived)

*hides in a bush*
*eats crab paste sandwiches*
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:50, archived)

*spits on your sandwich*

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:52, archived)

*hides Frazzles*

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:59, archived)

oh fuck you I'm going to have to buy crab paste now
and sandwich spread
(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:50, archived)

I'd be around the same age.
Friday brings me boobs.
My girlfriend is bringing them down for the weekend.
(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:55, archived)

BOTH of them?
Can I see them please?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 7:58, archived)

hmmmm, maybe

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:05, archived)

YES!
Boobs are super awesome!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:06, archived)

Super SUPER awesome!

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:09, archived)

www.b3tards.com/u/af10d6f92cc0af07c384/booby.jpg
(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:07, archived)

Somewhere Bollocks Parrot is fapping himself into a frenzy

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:08, archived)

i miss bollocks parrot :(

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:28, archived)

So do I :(
So what's the happy haps Mano?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:29, archived)

we just had a general staff meeting that was very dull
now i'm just looking forward to the weekend

how are YOU?
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:35, archived)

Yeah, not bad
Decided to work from home today. Already regretting it.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:37, archived)

whyzat?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:52, archived)

terrible wifi connection in a wheelie bin

(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:56, archived)

You'd think that, but it's actually quite fast

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:06, archived)

only because some cheeky kids have pushed you down a hill

(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:14, archived)

Inset day
One of the Little Caps is at home too.Too noisy
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:05, archived)

don't you have anywhere to hang your little caps?

I reckon you could peg them right up
(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:15, archived)

I do have a coat rack by the front door
It's way too high for them to be able to get down...hmmm....
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:17, archived)

if anything the noise will increase though

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:46, archived)

Davy Jones dies, and Celine Dion is just ill
There's no justice, is there?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:07, archived)

Did he go to Davy Jones' Locker?

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:10, archived)

Oh Mono....
They played Pleasant Valley Sunday on the radio yesterday. I expected them to play Daydream Believer, being a bit more obvious. I was pleasantly surprised.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:13, archived)

I used to watch them on TV :(
Obviously they were repeats, I'm not THAT old,
(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:13, archived)

Me too
Somewhere I have a recording of me and my cousin playing the theme tune to that. With drums and EVERYFING!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:15, archived)

WOAH!

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:18, archived)

the monkees were just a 60's version of Jedward.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:11, archived)

*GASPS*
Yeah, they were manufactured, but unlike Jedward they actually had some decent songs.
And a FUCKED UP movie. If you haven't seen 'Head' watch it. Now.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:14, archived)

irritating shit tv shows, check.
rubbish music, check.
crap hairstyles, check.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:24, archived)

I must respectfully disagree
Last Train to Clarksville
Porpoise Song
Circle Sky
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:25, archived)

not really a fan TH.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:32, archived)

Fair enough
I think it's a guitar thing with me. I love that old school sound.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:33, archived)

everytime I try and play last train to clarksville in my head it ends up as paperback writer.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:39, archived)

When I play Last Train in my head
it turns into 'Straightshooter' by Mamas & Papas.
Another group I adore.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:43, archived)

You see, the mistake you're making here is judging them on TODAYs standards.

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:27, archived)

And let's face it, I'd rather watch/listen to/look like the monkeys than most shit that's about today.

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:28, archived)

shit rip off beattles.
I think the beattles are wank so I'm not a fan.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:31, archived)

How old are you?

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:18, archived)

old enough.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:23, archived)

12 then?
*rubs thighs*
(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:24, archived)

well, we do need a new nonce now wombat has left 4eva.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:25, archived)

If I were a nonce I'd probably do everyone a favour and kill myself.

(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:26, archived)

could you do us this favour anyway?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:32, archived)

Fine.
Bye.
(

MONO!, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:41, archived)

Don't kill yourself Mono!
If you do, I'll be the shittest one here!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:41, archived)

I miss MONO! :'(

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:42, archived)

morning hatso.
Friday brings my husband home. yay! and i wouldn't be a kid again for all the money in the world. can I have 1994 back though please?
(

janet aylia proud resident of the fletcher memorial home, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:33, archived)

Hooray!
Sexy fun tiems?

What happened in 1994?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:35, archived)

did you see the janet subthread from the other day?

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:26, archived)

You must be joking
Janet wouldn't notice something, even if it were on her profile page.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:33, archived)

that's true
she has a history of missing things
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:34, archived)

Totally
You could put something right in front of her...say, for example, on her profile page, and she wouldn't notice it for weeks.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:38, archived)

I don't know, I've not been at even a quarter of the ages that there are to be so I can't possibly be expected to act like some kind of age connoisseur
ask me again when I'm one hundred and fifty.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:35, archived)

*waits*

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:36, archived)

I just took the dog down the meadow,
And the fog is so thick by the river that standing in the middle of the field was like being in a big white bubble. Not done that before.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:39, archived)

why didn't you tell us where you were going before you went out?
what if you got trapped in the bubble?
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:41, archived)

sorry,
I did have my phone. And a dog for protection.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:42, archived)

does harley look quite gormless?
all bug eyed and that.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:44, archived)

ahaha

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:49, archived)

yeah.
www.flickr.com/photos/64196717@N06/6799819992/
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:01, archived)

AWWW WHAT A SWEETIE
:D
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:02, archived)

she's gonna look well boss round the new pub.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:03, archived)

also I just added you as a contact hope you don't mind

(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:03, archived)

course not.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:04, archived)

I had a dream I had a dog last night
I told cree and he looked disapproving of my dream staffy.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:07, archived)

staffy's are lovely dogs really,
I'like one if I had the space and time.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:11, archived)

they are my favourite
when we move somewhere larger than a box I'd like a doglet.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:12, archived)

Aw man I added him as a contact too even though I don't use Flickr

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:58, archived)

I like your X-Wing,
also, your face.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:13, archived)

Shit I have pictures up there?
They're all OLD from at latest 2005
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:29, archived)

That's a DOG??

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:05, archived)

That's a really big piece of carpet,
she's 6ft long.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:07, archived)

That would be terrifying

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:08, archived)

Christ my flickr account is full of old, shit photos
Need to do some spring cleaning methinks
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:45, archived)

I don't use mine much,
because I'm not a shit photo bogging cunt.

How are you Frisbee?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:49, archived)

Was in a foul mood last night, had to do some bollocking and put up with a lot of whining from a student
I keep forgetting these people think that because they're students they have an automatic licence to be shit :/
How's you doing?
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:01, archived)

bored really,
waiting in for the insulation guy, playing flash games, really want to go work on the car, but I have to go up to dads as I don't have a drive. I hope he comes soon.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:05, archived)

I've got a shitload of work to get done before the weekend.
Probably not a good idea for me to stick around then. Good luck with the insulation/car/dad/flashgames
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:13, archived)

Friday is Post Day
so I'm packaging up hoodies and waiting for deliveries. Meanwhile I shall be playing WoW, tidying up, maybe some reading. Rock and rooooooll.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:42, archived)

Has the "at home all day every day" madness set in yet?

(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:44, archived)

It set in after about a week
I'm working at my mum's now, haha.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:48, archived)

Edmund!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:48, archived)

*looks blank*
*turns to baldmonkey for help*
*shrugs*
Erm... Michael?
(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:52, archived)

_{See ALT text}
(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:55, archived)

My secret shame :(

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:57, archived)

The fact remains
I've only met you once, and you still remember my name.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:07, archived)

Eddlington?

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:56, archived)

I might buy a hoodie,
Do you make them for children? I have a dinosaur obsessed cousin that would love one.

Also, how are you.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:46, archived)

Yeah, from 6 months to 13 years
they start at �40 :)

I'm good thanks - and you?
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:49, archived)

I'm ace,
waiting in for a man to come look at my loft and possibly give me FREE INSULATION.
To be fair, it seems a little late now that winter is nearing its close, and spring is pushing it's little head through the frozen soil. but stil, free stuff
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:02, archived)

Awesome
How much would a pickachu hoodie for a five year old cost?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:48, archived)

I've just done an adult-size pikachu actually
however as they're a custom design they're not cheap, I'm afraid. Even simple ones would be in the �70 region.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:49, archived)

Aha,,,well fair enough, You do make them yourself
Ok, Imma pray on that.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:50, archived)

I can knock out 3 dinohoodies in the time it takes to make one custom one
so yeah, there's the reason :)
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:51, archived)

Yeah, I can imagine

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:53, archived)

When you thought up doing dinohoodies for a living, did you think of any other business ideas that are better and don't involve sewing?
I'm just asking, no reason.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:54, archived)

I'll be honest with you Noit
it was either this or working for some other fucker for crap money for the rest of my life. I didn't go to Uni and I'm not terribly clever so my wages in an office can only go so high. But with this, I can earn as much as I'm able to. Ta-daaaaa.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:05, archived)

Balls.
I need an business idea because finding a new job is depressing me. Why aren't there any companies that don't just talk corporate bullshit all the time any more?
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:09, archived)

Oh I see what you're getting at
well I'm not telling you my other idea because it's saved for when someone buys Dinohoodie off me for lots of money, or I go bankrupt or something.
But I've found that import/selling looks to be a pretty sweet and easy thing to do, if you've got space to keep things. Buy clothes/toys/homewares off Alibaba.com, sell on market/online/on eBay, reap sweet sweet profits. You just need a warehouse and some upfront capital.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:12, archived)

Interesting.
I was hoping to have put together enough capital to get buy to let house but everything's gone a bit pete tong so that isn't likely to be happening for quite some time.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:13, archived)

Aww man, they sell apples so I could have a go at industrial level cider making
but the minimum buy-in is 22 tonnes. :(
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:15, archived)

woahhh
Noit brand cider would be cool
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:36, archived)

only if he prepared it using armlength condoms
I wouldn't drink anything his nobarms had stirred
(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:45, archived)

I'd love to give it a go but I have no orchard.
I dunno if I'd be able to scrump enough to even have a garden-gate type cider business. Not that we even have a garden gate.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:46, archived)

Start with one apple and work your way up
Just plant the seeds, you'll have an orchard in no time

In Noit time
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:37, archived)

I wanna be that age where I could get away with watching cartoons back-to-back without someone telling me to stop because I have to go to work or something
Man, things like Doug, Rocko's Modern Life, Rugrats, Animaniacs, Tiny Toon Adventures, Dexter's Laboratory, Hey Arnold, Aargh Real Monsters, Johnny Bravo, Cow & Chicken, Powerpuff Girls, Angry Beavers, CatDog... aah...
(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:47, archived)

I read some CatDog fan fiction the other day
It was....alarming.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:49, archived)

One fine day with a woof and a purr

(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:56, archived)

Just a feline canine little CatDog!
I did like that show, I'm not ashamed.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:58, archived)

me too,

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:02, archived)

aw shit yeah
from 7 in the morning until 1pm, nothing but cartoons.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:51, archived)

there should be a channel that just shows cartoons from this era
because they were clearly the best.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:08, archived)

I'd let Invader Zim slide.
Fuck Spongebob
(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:21, archived)

a couple of guys at Uni were invader zim mad,
I never got in to it.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:24, archived)

It was intelligently written and utter surprising that Nickelodeon would hire the guy who created Johnny The Homicidal Maniac to develop a cartoon for them

(

Eddache EddEgg on DrawSomething. Also BUY MY BOOK YOU SHIT, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:33, archived)

maximinimus used to bang on about it. i've seen quite a few episodes. it's alright.

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:54, archived)

It was a wonderful time in our lives.
Angry Beavers was my favourite.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 8:59, archived)

I am Weasel for me.
I know it was only one real joke but it got me quite a lot of the time.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:03, archived)

true,
that was ace. Those were some good days for cartoons. *nostalgias*
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:04, archived)

Mama had a chicken, Mama had a cow, Dad was proud, He didn't care how!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:09, archived)

angry beavers was MY favourite too!

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:41, archived)

YEAH!
*fives*
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:44, archived)

\o/
www.dvdtalk.com/reviews/images/reviews/190/1324651963_5.jpg
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:04, archived)

I miss Johnny Bravo :(

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:10, archived)

I'd be 16 and angry at everything.

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:05, archived)

~~angry~~ wank
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:06, archived)

STOP READING MY MIND

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:08, archived)

Continued misery.

(

Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:07, archived)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=B3FzW5vQUm4
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:35, archived)

That's just a black screen to the sound of pigs being slaughtered to me.

(

Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:37, archived)

:((((((((((

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:45, archived)

DISHRACK UPDATE:
it looks the business guys, really. my kitchen looks brighter and cleaner now.

Stopped using a dishbwl too and it doesn't look too bad, crisis averted. For now.
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:34, archived)

My house is making some odd noises today Q
What should I do about it?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:39, archived)

Invite baldmonkey round
Then weird noises will be the least of your worries.
(

Lord Gnome, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:47, archived)

Not a bad idea

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:08, archived)

ear muffs

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:49, archived)

pics or gtfo

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:42, archived)

oh right, i'll take some toinight and post later

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:49, archived)

shit man
i don't really come here at all after clocking off on a friday.
can you post them on monday morning so i've got something to look forward to?
(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:55, archived)

i'll gaz you the whole deal

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:07, archived)

Hey woah there
What am I, chopped liver?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:11, archived)

your here like 100% of the time, you'll see the original post

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:12, archived)

I DON'T COME HERE IN THE EVENINGS!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:15, archived)

can we send multiple gazzes like to lots of people at the same time?
i'll do that
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:01, archived)

Are you asking for pictures of his rack?

(

Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:18, archived)

absolutely

(

manolith - modomite, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:47, archived)

this is quite similar to it
www.pittjug.org/b2b/semiconductors/1/stainless_steel_dish_25.html
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:04, archived)

why did you decide to go with the 0.091cbm/ctn version?

(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:11, archived)

well its got plate racks, an area for bowls/mugs etc and cutlery
i mean its the whole deal, you know?
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:12, archived)

Friday brings me WORK, THE WORK OF THE GODS
If I could be any age I'd probably be Twenty Six. I had a good time then.
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 9:57, archived)

Cool

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:43, archived)

What happened when you were 26 mr Theoban?
I've not been 26 yet, what do I have to look forward to?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:45, archived)

I moved to France and had a lot of drinks in places
It was quite nice
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:46, archived)

I don't really want to live in France.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 10:59, archived)

just have drinks in lots of places like theo
in pubs, in bars, in the park, in disabled toilets, in a wheelbarrow, up a tree, down a tree
(GluEid Saeed, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 11:02, archived)

Good evening night /talkers,
What's going on?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:16, archived)

Hey Windy,
Seems to be very little in my opinion. What's going on for you?
(

Pig Bodine, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:31, archived)

Evening Bod,
Watching Police Interceptors and winding down from work, busy night again.
proper nasty fog out here as well, not an enjoyable drive home for sure.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:37, archived)

I fucking love Police Interceptors,
makes me turn into one of the Orphans in The Warriors
"This is what you get, this is what you get when you mess with the Police Interceptors"
I'm usually stood up and shouting by this point.
(

Pig Bodine, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:40, archived)

I once went to a party with some mates dressed as the baseball furies.
MORE FACTS LATER READERS!
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:48, archived)

Did you round the night off with this? -
www.galleryoftattoosnow.com/AlexDepaseTatuaggiHOSTED/images/gallery/BaseballFuries_D.jpg

Would've been a homerun!
(

Pig Bodine, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:58, archived)

well
I've just finished work and trying to decided what film to watch
(Just Harry Is using his sig irresponsibly, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:40, archived)

Ghostbusters.
Easy.
(

Pig Bodine, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:40, archived)

Good,
But what about Escape from New York for a bit of culture?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:49, archived)

Agreed. One needs stimulation of the soul,
so I would continue on from EFNY with John Carpenter's earlier film Assault on Precinct 13 followed by Porkies.
(

Pig Bodine, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 1:00, archived)

i reckon we round off the night with some life lessons.
Dawn of the Dead (original Romero 1974) should teach everyone a few things about both zombies and bikers.
And with Harry's evening sorted, I'm off to bed.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 1:03, archived)

Toodle pip old bean.

(

Pig Bodine, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 1:06, archived)

St David's Day pun thread. Welsh versions of films and/or TV programmes.
Boyo's From The Black Stuff.
(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:21, archived)

Love, Isn't It?
/Wicca'd
(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:23, archived)

Hmm, proper dead in here.

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:29, archived)

again

(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:58, archived)

Fabulous piece of trolling on another forum tonight DT.
'Why is the policemen who got shot by Raul classed as brave?'
(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:02, archived)

that aint trollin, that is the problem with the internet now, trolling is a long game, not ust a flipant comment, it might be to spastics, no offence

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:16, archived)

When is it no longer too soon to make a joke about Assad being Homsophopic?

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:19, archived)

i cant see the relevant to my comment, no offence

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:32, archived)

Since when do you think b3ta has been about logical discourse?
I thought non sequitir was the par for the course.
(

Pope Shax IX forgives you, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:07, archived)

shit piss motherfucker

(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:58, archived)

Are you crediting me with that, or telling me what you have done?
It wasn't me if the former.
(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 2:38, archived)

If anybody says Dai Hard I will kill everyone they know.

(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:32, archived)

lol you just said it

(

Moon Girl Technologies fuck off Team GB, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:09, archived)

Dai Hard.
Start with Baldmonkey please.
(

Pope Shax IX forgives you, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:10, archived)

Dai Another Day

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:32, archived)

ooh, lucky escape from Noit's wrath there.

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:34, archived)

imagine them flailing knob arms coming at you
followed by those sad, pitiful eyes
(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:45, archived)

Mr and Mrs Jones

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:35, archived)

Twin Leeks

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:36, archived)

Don't Look You Now

(

Ring Of Fire you were freaking out, I had to take you down, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:37, archived)

Oh, well played there Tribute Act.

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:39, archived)

Dai, Mommie, Dai!

(augsav, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:40, archived)

The Lovely Jones

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:43, archived)

Mad Max Boyce: Beyond The Millennium Stadium

(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:43, archived)

The Princess And The Sir Sand Goblin.

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:44, archived)

What's Eating Rhod Gilbert's Grape?

(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:44, archived)

YES.

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:44, archived)

Of Mice and Men of Harlech

(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:44, archived)

Cwtch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.

(

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver The thought of actually having kids makes me heave, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:45, archived)

There's Lovely Bones

(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:48, archived)

Bore Da Efo Richard A Judy

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:51, archived)

The X Sosban Fachtor

(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:49, archived)

Stoppit and Tidy.

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:49, archived)

Isn't it half hot mum.

(

Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:50, archived)

Gavin Henson's Creature Workshop

(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:51, archived)

Queer eye for the menai straight guy

(

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver The thought of actually having kids makes me heave, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:53, archived)

Children of Bread of Heaven

(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:53, archived)

Father Ted, Boyo.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:54, archived)

Only Fools And Horses, Boyo.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:54, archived)

Hollyoaks, Boyo.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:55, archived)

One Man And His Dog, Boyo.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:55, archived)

Llondon's Burning.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:55, archived)

Boyo.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:55, archived)

It Ain't 'Alf Raining, Mum.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:56, archived)

Keeping Up A Hostility Towards The Proper British.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:56, archived)

Jumping Jack Action.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:57, archived)

Most Haunted, Boyo.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:57, archived)

Dead Snow, Don.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:59, archived)

Keeping Up With The Cardiffians.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:00, archived)

Eurotrash, Boyo.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:00, archived)

Black Swan, See.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:00, archived)

The Addams Family.
Boyo.
(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:03, archived)

My Big Fat Taffy Wedding.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:06, archived)

Dr LlandudNo

(

h3donist totally spamming my novel - see profile :), Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:21, archived)

Wide Sargasso Swansea

(

cumquat may because you're mine, I walk the lino, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:23, archived)

Gerraint Expectations

(

cumquat may because you're mine, I walk the lino, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:24, archived)

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogossip girl

(

magnum, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:28, archived)

Llove Actually

(

The Hedgehog From Hell should be drowned like a superfluous kitten, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:32, archived)

Aberystwythnail and I

(

h3donist totally spamming my novel - see profile :), Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:37, archived)

a place in the country
is on fire
(Mehitabel_Itrang, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:37, archived)

Russell T. Davis of the Triffids

(

The Hedgehog From Hell should be drowned like a superfluous kitten, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:41, archived)

bllllllllllllllackadder

(

Lightguy, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:47, archived)

The Welshman that went up Moel Famau but came down Snowdon.

(

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver The thought of actually having kids makes me heave, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:47, archived)

Pobwl y Cwm
Am I doing this wrong?
(

sargant, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:47, archived)

shaun of the sheep

(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:47, archived)

the laver birds

(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:50, archived)

one for our older listeners there!

(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:50, archived)

i know th liver birds, dont get the oke tho, vlad, what was the 12 thing about?

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:55, archived)

it was about www.b3ta.com/talk/7456740 I am sorry for any offence caused if you have been affected by the issues in this thread, go ahead and gaz the mods, they'll get right on it as ever
(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:19, archived)

hey, that is cool, i'm glad i got my twelve
it is all cool bro
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:21, archived)

maybe I'll turn it into a really long game of board bingo just for you

(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:22, archived)

i think i would need a bingo card to play on, you cant just do numbers
were all my bingo forum days in vain :(
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:39, archived)

Face/Offa's

(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:52, archived)

I've got to be honest here, I'm fucking proud of that

(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 21:52, archived)

it's good

(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:48, archived)

Huw Dares Gwynedd

(

The Great Architect, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:20, archived)

Eisteddfod Zebra

(

The Great Architect, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:20, archived)

9½ Leeks

(

The Great Architect, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:21, archived)

Casino Rhyl

(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:21, archived)

Sheep Ass in Seattle

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:21, archived)

The Eagle Has Llandudno

(

The Great Architect, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:22, archived)

PFFFFT

(

vladimir, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:23, archived)

The Llandudno That Time Forgot

(

The Great Architect, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:24, archived)

Llanbedrogs and Broomsticks

(

The Great Architect, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:25, archived)

Godzilla, Boyo.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:29, archived)

Who framed Roger Rarebit?

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:30, archived)

The human centileeked

(

Sn0tters, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 22:55, archived)

Saving Ryan Giggs's privacy.

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:02, archived)

Lest we forget
www.b3tards.com/u/d81a83cf6d5a93144ba7/can_you_see_where_this_is_going.jpg
(

The Hedgehog From Hell should be drowned like a superfluous kitten, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:21, archived)

Good, but do you think you could condense it to 3 frames and replace the characters with dots?

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:55, archived)

Sheep Fuckerstie Allsop's Bathroom Nightmares

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:09, archived)

When the Wales came.

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:46, archived)

About a Boyo

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 23:47, archived)

Mary Popty ping

(

executiverocker only wears C&A, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:04, archived)

28 Leeks Later
is that one?
(

Pig Bodine, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:37, archived)

Dubs thread instead?

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:21, archived)

If I keep doing this, will I go on the Dubstep?
lol!!1!
(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:30, archived)

So what do you lot make of this?
wikileaks.org/gifiles/releasedate/2012-02-29-18-obl-s-body-transfered-to-delaware-with-cia.html

Any of you been reading the GIFiles?
(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:00, archived)

Don't really care, I can't work out why we have no accepted cross browser update to a gif though.
Can't someone animate some PNGs or something?
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:02, archived)

Alright Gonz, how's the 'Get Gonz Laid In 2012' campaign going?

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 19:35, archived)

Third time's a charm, got a "I don't know if it's a date or not" on saturday, with a doctor too.
Had to re-arrange it twice now, but third time's the charm.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 19:53, archived)

I removed all the SLATEDL lot from my FB the other day, realised that if they don't trust me with their real profiles, I don't trust them.
I'll still post'n'shit, but they ain't gettin' access to private info, one of 'em posted someone grot that was in someone's private profile which I thought was cunty and irrelivent.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 19:55, archived)

I saw that, and support your stance.
I've had a few requests from them and refused 'em all.
(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 19:58, archived)

I've always refused to pay attention to them

(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:11, archived)

Cool ! Yeah', probs for the best, it would be so easy for some nutter to take it too far.
I'm in it for the lolz.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:35, archived)

I still get notifications from those cunts, even though I'm banned.
I can't turn off said notifications, because I am banned.
(

BraynDedd is a cunt Jesus, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:06, archived)

pwned.

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:11, archived)

Fucking facebook, man.

(

BraynDedd is a cunt Jesus, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:12, archived)

we're stuck in a shit thread, Brayn
it's been there for hours, and we're talking about facebook. Fix this.
(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:18, archived)

Done.

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:21, archived)

Fuck you Trouser, fuck you.

(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:22, archived)

You know it was bound to happen.

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:31, archived)

Blomin' 'eck, you were only about for a weekend or soo.

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:35, archived)

I dared to point out that one of the admins was acting the cunt.

(

BraynDedd is a cunt Jesus, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:41, archived)

Alright Dekion
You're missing a spotify link there
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:03, archived)

pfft, thanks for that.

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:04, archived)

Brilliant stuff
wikileaks.org/gifiles/docs/1666377_fbi-more-on-body-.html
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:09, archived)

Proper lol

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:20, archived)

The logo looks nothing like goatse but still reminded me of it.
Fuck you, internet.
(

mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:15, archived)

:-D

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:20, archived)

Can you tell us why this is important?

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:38, archived)

Did I say it was?

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 19:53, archived)

it's intriguing

(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 18:19, archived)

That? Well, I can make a Hat, or a Brooch, or a Pterodactyl!

(

The Great Architect, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 18:29, archived)

It fills me pure unadulterated apathy.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 18:32, archived)

Yes, but that's what they WANT you to think.

(

The Hedgehog From Hell should be drowned like a superfluous kitten, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 18:53, archived)

I hear he's now one of Cameron's special advisors

(

cumquat may because you're mine, I walk the lino, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 19:08, archived)

meeeeeeeh

(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 20:00, archived)

I'm a member of CAMRA
What are you a member of?
And b3ta doesn't count cause it's shit.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:24, archived)

I'm also a member of The Sad Muppet Society.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:28, archived)

I'm a member of our book group
But I ain't been for a few months
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:29, archived)

What book?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:29, archived)

Which book?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:29, archived)

Witch book?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:29, archived)

Watt book?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:30, archived)

Last one we did was 1984
I like that book. The main woman who organises it wanted to compare it to The Hobbit
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:30, archived)

I'm finding it hard to draw comparisons here

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:33, archived)

She does it with every book we talk about
About how the Hobbit teaches you correct morals, and how to live, and how it's not depressing, but 1984 is very depressing. Also in the Hobbit they don't have newspeak they have Elfish, which has different grammar rules. Did you know the Hobbit film is coming out in December? I love the Hobbit. Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit Hobbit
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:34, archived)

Blimey
She's not related to Tolkein is she?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:36, archived)

Perhaps she's only ever read The Hobbit and nothing else
Thorin sitting down and starting to sing about gold used to piss me off.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:36, archived)

I haven't read it since I was a kid, but all I know is 1) LOTR bored me to tears and 2) She's a cretin

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:38, archived)

If you got into the chest at the start and closed the lid
You couldn't do fuck all else apart from stumble round in the dark. That was a bit shit too.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:41, archived)

You just have to keep going E until you get to Mirkwood
GET WITH IT GNOMEY
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:44, archived)

Was that where you used to get killed by things falling out of trees?
Didn't much like that bit either. Killing Elrond was fun though.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:47, archived)

Fellowship was a real slog
I gave up eventually
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:41, archived)

I enjoyed it the first time around, struggled to read it again though.
The second two books were much better.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:43, archived)

I remember liking them as a kid but reading them now, it's just walking, walking, walking, walking, walking, taters, walking, walking, walking Gollum was naughty, walking, walking walking walking

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:45, archived)

+ a lot of shit songs

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:47, archived)

I think I fucked the whole thing off after the whole "eleventy-first" bullshit in the first page or two.

(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:53, archived)

I don't think I'll like The Hobbit (film), I didn't like Lord Of The Ring (film/s) because there were too many forrest scenes.

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:43, archived)

This seems like a silly reason to me.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:48, archived)

I can't stand scenes in films where people are walking around a forrest just talking to themselves over and over and over.
They're worst than casino gambling scenes.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:54, archived)

Ever seen Miller's Crossing?
I don't imagine you would like it.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:57, archived)

Nope, donno about it.
I like lots of different films though. I just don't like scene when people are playing cards or walking in forrests for an extended period of time.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:00, archived)

both printed on paper using ink
available in hard AND paperback
both can be found in most libraries

this is easy, two hats. get your head in the game.
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:35, archived)

You're really not far off it there
She compared Catch 22 to The Hobbit because in Catch 22 there's a war and there's something about a war in The Hobbit
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:36, archived)

Someone I know hates Harry Potter and claims that it ripped off the Lord of the Rings.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:37, archived)

The Star Wars comparisons are closer to the mark
But either way, quest/magic/good vs evil stories all blend into one anyway. It's difficult to do something like that and NOT have it compared to something else.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:39, archived)

My girlfriend's mum was comparing Tintin to Superman.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:42, archived)

May God have mercy on us all

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:43, archived)

Aren't they all based on something that shakespear wrote? Didn't he invent every story arc in history?

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:01, archived)

He copied all his stuff from the bible.

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:02, archived)

I imagine that they are both available in e-book format too.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:36, archived)

Sorry, I've had a tough week

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:37, archived)

I've not read it.
My brother keeps pestering me to.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:34, archived)

I'd recommend Brave New World over it, even though Brave New World gets more preachy and has all this weird Model T Ford worship

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:35, archived)

How does it compare to The Hobbit?

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:37, archived)

Was it written by Henry Ford?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:38, archived)

Al Does Hugs Me (as my ex used to call him)

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:40, archived)

I should mention that she used to call me Al
That might make more sense
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:41, archived)

No her name was not Betty

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:41, archived)

have you got naked pictures of her?

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:44, archived)

Not anymore

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:45, archived)

Hoho....here we go
*rubs hands*
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:45, archived)

Sorry man I deleted them after we broke up
I was trying to be nice :(
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:49, archived)

you fool!

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:51, archived)

National Secular Society and Amnesty International

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:30, archived)

Nothing I'm afraid
Totally winning the Wrestlemania raffle though. I'll send you a postcard. Loser.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:31, archived)

I'm not entering.
Are you not even in some kind of guitar club?
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:35, archived)

No
What you're forgetting Mono, is that I don't like people.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:38, archived)

Oh, I see.
Yet you sit here all day talking to them ONLINE
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:39, archived)

I assumed you were all bots
Aren't I the only actual person here?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:40, archived)

No, you're baldmonkey

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:42, archived)

Am I? I don't feel like Baldmonkey
But then I suppose I would say that
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:43, archived)

QED

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:44, archived)

Aren't you a member of Personality Horse?

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:51, archived)

how much did you splash on tickets?
i got the 10 tickets for $15 thing since that's still less than a tenner in real money
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:36, archived)

I only got 5
I may buy more
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:37, archived)

i have a certificate on the wall behind me that suggests i am a member of the 'little lebowski urban achievers'

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:36, archived)

What is this please?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:38, archived)

it's a fictional club that is mentioned in the film 'the big lebowski'
which happens to be my favourite film

i was also in the dennis the menace fan club and i guess technically i still am
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:50, archived)

I know Dennis the Menace, but I've never seen The Big Lebowski.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:51, archived)

then my advice to you is simple, my sweet mono
watch the big lebowski
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:29, archived)

I don't think I'm a member of anything.
Does a gym count?
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:39, archived)

If you are a member of a gym, then yes being a member of a gym counts as being a member of something.
WHERE'S MY FUCKING ANSWER
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:40, archived)

What answer?

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:42, archived)

*ignores*

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:43, archived)

*endzone dances*

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:48, archived)

I was a free mason for a bit, true story. I had to get my tits out to a bunch of old men.
It wasn't for me, I think I might try the Hell's Angles next.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:42, archived)

There's a club I used to frequent called The Agincourt.
It's a complete shithole, and pretty much the only reason it's still running is because upstairs is a masonic lodge.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:50, archived)

this is like louis therouxs weird weekends, but without the boring bits

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:50, archived)

Haha

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:03, archived)

Balls to this, I'm going home

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:44, archived)

Don't go

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:49, archived)

I thought you were already home.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:50, archived)

*waggles privates in your general direction and flicks V-signs*

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:52, archived)

boyzone
(ThunderCuntTheCharlatan deceived you on, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:45, archived)

Sing us a song.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:51, archived)

i'm a member when all this were fields

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:47, archived)

What is this please?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:52, archived)

Please
please/plz/Verb: Cause to feel happy and satisfied: "he arranged a fishing trip to please his son".
Adverb: Used in polite requests or questions.
Synonyms: verb. satisfy - gratify - like
adverb. kindly
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:55, archived)

St John Ambulance
I'd rather heal 'em than kill 'em.

Also, a great many members of CAMRA are twats. Could you table a motion to stop them being twats? You seem like the kind of chap to get this done. Cheers.
(

wynoh is no good at poker, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:00, archived)

No problem.
Hobgoblin is on the list of pubs participating in the Ale Trail.
I might pop over there.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 17:10, archived)

And now, someone that doesn't have a tiny dog!
I went to a guitar shop earlier and saw lots of things I desperately want, but cannot afford.

What do you want, but cannot afford?

Alt: How's your Mum?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:50, archived)

posh camera

(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:53, archived)

Ooh nice
I have a friend whose real passion is photography. At one point he had about 7 cameras, ranging from 80 quid to well over a grand. He still used them to take pointless pictures mind.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:55, archived)

A colleague of mine spends around £200-500 on camera stuff most months.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:55, archived)

Everyone has their passions
I'd spend thousands on guitars every day if I could.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:58, archived)

I wouldn't
I'd be happy with a nice acoustic and a nice electric, or even just an electric-acoustic.
Oh and likewise with a ukulele too
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:59, archived)

Good
I am a total obsessive though. I'm not ashamed. Perhaps I should be.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:01, archived)

I think I'd spend a lot of money on boobs.
Boobs and fancy computer stuff.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:02, archived)

Or some fancy computer boobs!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:03, archived)

WOAH!

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:04, archived)

INORITE?

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:04, archived)

Spend enough time on your computer
and the boobs will take care of themselves, I reckon.
(

Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:16, archived)

Are you saying that women find bearded internet shut ins attractive?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:20, archived)

Unpleasant women, yes

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:21, archived)

I'm not talking about women's boobs.

(

Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:44, archived)

oh I see

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:51, archived)

yeah
I like cameras more than I like taking pictures, sadly
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:07, archived)

What do you reckon of this new 41mpx nokia camera phone?
Is there anyone out there, beyond the technical team who "Well, we made it possible, so let's do it", who thinks its a good idea? Isn't each file gonna be like 50gb ?
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:47, archived)

nah not from what i read about it, that's why it doesn't run wp7 or something, dunno

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:54, archived)

resolution isn't much use past 15mpx or so
past that it's just wankery. Detail is not visible to the naked eye unless you're blowing it up to the size of a building. Glass is more important, and sensor size (physical size). A cameraphone can only ever be so good.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:57, archived)

Sir JMG.

(

Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:53, archived)

Alright JMG.
Just bought FIFA 12. I'm shit at it.
(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:54, archived)

I'm great at it.
Football!

It's the derby on Sunday. Oh aye.
(

Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:57, archived)

*waits*
b3ta.com/questions/firstworldproblems/post1546115
(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:00, archived)

Anything to do with this?
b3ta.com/questions/corporateidiocy/post1545713
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:06, archived)

Or this?
b3ta.com/questions/firstworldproblems/post1546183
(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:30, archived)

Howdy!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:55, archived)

Your mum.
She's ok.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:54, archived)

Haha!
Mono does it again!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:57, archived)

STOP TALKING DOWN TO ME

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:59, archived)

You noticed that?
How clever of you!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:02, archived)

The best way to assure someone you're not patronising them
is to pat them on the head while you say it, then offer them a sweety afterwards.
(

Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:04, archived)

I just read WHATS BREWING

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:06, archived)

You did?

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:09, archived)

Yeah!
I got it weeks ago and totally didn't read it until today
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:13, archived)

SIGN THIS YOU CUNTS
epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/29664
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:13, archived)

If the great British
pub is so great, people would still go to them.
(username failed moderation, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:41, archived)

Yes, because things being good or bad are the ONLY reasons people do anything.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:54, archived)

Is that
written in English?
(username failed moderation, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:56, archived)

if you are going to try and bully mono do it properly, if not fuck off back to questions for the weak

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:57, archived)

Well at least I can
understand what you're saying.

Not that it's terribly bright.
(username failed moderation, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:04, archived)

you do realise that this forum is based on purile piss poor comedy? it was never set up for sub standard bloggers

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:06, archived)

woah there fella,
Mongy is a cornerstone of this site. He's already saved Quinten from suicide today, and was the first man on the ground when the Noit incident happened.
You best back off a little.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:08, archived)

IMA LEAVIN 4 EVA :(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:08, archived)

So long sweet prince.
You will be missed.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:19, archived)

At least most of us
here don't
fragment our sen
tences in such a downs
way.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:08, archived)

manolith fact:
when i had a paper round, one of the roads on my route was called the downsway
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:15, archived)

I have a friend that used to live in The Fairway
Imagine that!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:21, archived)

i delivered papers there too!

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:23, archived)

Woah

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:27, archived)

I never thought a fight would ever break out during a Two Hats thread
I'm depressed and leaving forever
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:14, archived)

Le fucke offe

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:17, archived)

Zut alors!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:22, archived)

go shove your brain up your cockend and shit out an interesting thought.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:18, archived)

The ONLY reason any of us come round here anymore is cos of mongy
And here you are having a go at him, for shame, you should go think about what it is you have done here today young man
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:27, archived)

And there I was thinking you all liked me, turns out it's mongy ;'(

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:29, archived)

I shall slit my wrists immediately.
Tell Mono it's not his fault, he shouldn't blame himself for any of this.
(username failed moderation, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:31, archived)

Woah and now you're threatening poor Mono
He's just a little kid, never caused no fuss, he just does what's right by folk
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:31, archived)

Oh Theo
What ever am I to do?
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:38, archived)

Have a big mug of mead

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:44, archived)

FUCK YEAH!
I don't have any though.
I might have a cup of tea and a slice of cake instead.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:46, archived)

That sounds lovely
Try and not let them get to you man, you're better than this
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:51, archived)

Let's face it, I'm better than everyone.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:59, archived)

price doesn't even come into it, ever

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:56, archived)

No way.
Why anyone would worry about price, especially during a time where lots of people are out of work, is beyond me.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:58, archived)

teeth carved into the shapes of safari animals
giraffles for canines, elephant molars, the front teeth would be roaring lions
(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:56, archived)

I like this

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:59, archived)

Philistine
I'd have my teeth engraved like the Elgin Marbles, and then go to Greece and grin at everyone.
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:15, archived)

Or have them
carved into the shapes of the falklands, and go to Argentina.
(username failed moderation, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:38, archived)

Baldmonkey stands on Southsea beath, mouth agape
chanting taunts at the Isle of Wight and his own dental Needles.
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:45, archived)

Your mum.
Oh, hang on, you said "want but cannot afford" - sorry, had that the wrong way round.
(

Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:56, archived)

Creative! I like it!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:58, archived)

we just realised we all forgot it was a colleague's birthday at the start of the month
I guess this is why most places have the 'bring a cake on your own birthday' thing
(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:57, archived)

Well then fuck 'em
If they can't be bothered, why should you?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:59, archived)

we don't have this policy so every feels awful
It's on 'the list' but she didn't even come in wearing a party hat or a badge with her age on it to give us a hint
(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:01, archived)

Does she maybe not want it acknowledged?
I know some people like that. Not me. It's my birthday on Sunday by the way.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:02, archived)

GIFT SORTED
(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:08, archived)

Shit!
I must know where this is.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:11, archived)

Ottawa I believe

(wimbley is feeling hungover, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:40, archived)

WIMBLEY!
How are you me old Nicker?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:46, archived)

mostly fine..

(wimbley is feeling hungover, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:47, archived)

you feeling any better?

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:55, archived)

marginally, I aim to get pissed later - it may help (or not)

(wimbley is feeling hungover, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:58, archived)

*mod edit*
B3ta encourages you to drink responsibly
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:06, archived)

This is sensible advice
However, the failure of Two Hats to even acknowledge my helpful response means I must imbibe heavily to blot out the pain
(wimbley is feeling hungover, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:03, archived)

Many apologies, I didn't want to interupt
Ottowa is a little far for me to travel. I guess for now I'll have to enjoy the picture. Thank you for your help.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:08, archived)

My pleasure

(wimbley is feeling hungover, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:10, archived)

Fucking mods,
My advice was to drink till you can't see then take a fat bird home and embarrras yourself by losing your erection while trying to crack one off on her tits.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:10, archived)

Oh man
What an awful night that would turn out to be
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:13, archived)

And yet every Friday evening, without fail�

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:22, archived)

~~Fri~~ Week
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:25, archived)

Chance would be a fine thing

(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:31, archived)

Um, yeah, I'm glad I'm not THAT guy....

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:23, archived)

a trip to all the big theme parks in florida
she's fine. very excited about going on holiday next week.
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:57, archived)

It's within your grasp, gentle Manolith
Take that beautiful lady of yours. I can recommend a nice little chapel :D
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:00, archived)

does it have a loop the loop?

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:02, archived)

It sure does!
And a white grand piano!

Imagine that!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:03, archived)

fucking expensive though
i rarely have any money to my name
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:03, archived)

Yes, it's not cheap
You may have to go on the game. That's what I did.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:04, archived)

i have everything i want, even got myself a nice shiny new dishrack, yeah
thats how i roll
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:01, archived)

ah fuck, can't get a matching wash bowl
this whole thing is a waste of time
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:06, archived)

A dishrack??
Well la-de-da, Mr.Park Avenue. Some of us have to dry stuff and put it away immediately.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:06, archived)

look i wasn't flaunting my wealth, this was a real problem for me
the old plastic one collected dirt, i've gone stainelss steel now and i ain't goin back
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:07, archived)

I hope one day to reach these dizzying heights of wealth
Thank you Quinten, for exposing me to this and giving me new aspirations.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:12, archived)

shot myself in the foot didn't i two hats? you can't get a matching bowl for a stainless steel rack can you?
mugged myself big style
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:13, archived)

Oh mate
I don't know what to say.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:16, archived)

all we can do is light a candle
and hope
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:19, archived)

sh ck ck sh

LoL
(

RR I love you ... in a way, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:07, archived)

my sails have been robbed of their wind
thanks for bringing me down to earth with a nasty bump, i'll keep my good fortune to myself from now on
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:08, archived)

my mums dead, thanks for bringing it up :(

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:04, archived)

Well I'm very sorry to hear that

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:05, archived)

~~brin~~ dig
it her
(

Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:05, archived)

I would also like a new guitar
Or two.

Specifically this www.soundslive.co.uk/product~name~Hagstrom-Viking-Standard-Hollow-Body-Electric-Guitar~ID~14544.asp
(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:06, archived)

a mate of mine showed me a really cheap online german guitar shop recently

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:06, archived)

Ooh, what's it called?

(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:08, archived)

i dunno, i wasn't prepared for follow up questions
thomann?
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:08, archived)

That's probably the one, cheers QO

(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:11, archived)

Thomann are excellent
Depends on the exchange rate of course, but generally they're very competitive
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:14, archived)

Prices are much better than GAK, etc
Shame I still can't afford any of it :D
(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:19, archived)

Thomann are pretty good for pickups
My plan was to buy an Ibanez RG and swap the pickups out for Dimarzio's. Alas, my lounge has sapped my BUPA money and most of my bonus.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:21, archived)

Good to know, I was hoping to build a guitar if I couldn't afford a decent branded one.

(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:33, archived)

Check this guy out too
Seco
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:56, archived)

i'm not arguing with you

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:19, archived)

That's what I like about you the most

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:22, archived)

xxx<3<3Two Hats<3<3xxx

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:23, archived)

I got me electric piano from Thomann
The only problem I had is that the pedals don't work, and they said 'cool no worries, just box it up and we'll pick it up. Oh by the way if it's something small that's wrong we'll charge you for shipping' so fuck that, me pedals are still bust. Sad times.
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:34, archived)

why didn't you just pay for shipping you pikey shit?

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:36, archived)

Cos at the time I wasn't that rich and it was shipping for a big heavy container cross a couple of countries
Also I'll pay for what I like, ta
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:40, archived)

maybe you shouldn't buy expensive electrical equipment if you can't afford packing?

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:46, archived)

I didn't it was a gift
I hope that's ok Quinten. Are there any more irrelevant details you want just because you're upset today and you've decided it's time to liven up your day by being mean to me?
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:49, archived)

he's having washing up issues, go steady, this sort of thing finished off poor noit :(

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:52, archived)

cheers mc

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:59, archived)

hey, everyone helped when my bed was deemed too high, i like to give something back

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:04, archived)

you never stop giving, your the st nick of b3ta

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:10, archived)

sorry you're feeling down man
I didn't know, I'd nosh you off if I thought it would cheer you up
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:32, archived)

it might...

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:38, archived)

STRUMMFRONT

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:12, archived)

I approve of this

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:15, archived)

SHREDDINFREUDE

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:16, archived)

DURCHFALL

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:23, archived)

IBANJEwZ
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:26, archived)

They are actually quite nice, and reasonably priced
See also the Super Swede. Great little guitar.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:15, archived)

A tour of New Zealand.
I'd guess she's fine, I text her earlier to wish her a happy St. David's day.
(

JackAction, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:10, archived)

woah woah woah are you welsh?

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:13, archived)

I'd like to go there one day
and Happy St.David's day to you AND your Mum.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:17, archived)

Thanks Two Hats, this'll make her day.

(

JackAction, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:40, archived)

A mine sweeper or patrol boat
My Mum's a bit worried about cash, they had some woes with tenants in their Budapest flat, but it's working itself out now. Should be alright.
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:12, archived)

Oh, that'd suit you down to the ground

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:19, archived)

I'd probably need a lot of money just to live on too
If I ever get rich though, it's boat buying time and then I'll just bump around little sunny islands for the rest of days
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:22, archived)

I used to play guitar
I had a washburn. I was shit, and I'm still convinced I'd be awesome if I'd forked out for an Ibanez.

I can't afford the tumbledown ruined house on the Vistula escarpment that I had my eye on.
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:13, archived)

Do you remember what model Washburn it was?
I really want an N4. But they're pretty dear. They're bringing out a budget version, but it looks like it'll be total shit.
Also, which Ibanez?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:18, archived)

WR-150 MPU, which is some sort of metallic purple colour.
But I almost spunked my entire student loan on Ibanez Warlock. Played a mate's one and fell in love with it.
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:21, archived)

Ibanez Warlock?
Not heard of that. Not a BC Rich Warlock?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:30, archived)

You're probably right, this is all 10 years ago
The BC Rich was one, now I'm confused as to which Ibanez I preferred over that.
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:39, archived)

I was looking at a BC Rich Mockingbird today, love them
I used to have a BC Rick Kerry King V. Fucking massive thing that was. It was more murder weapon than guitar.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:49, archived)

was this a bon jovi song? i know you are into all that heavy metal stuff

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:31, archived)

I've seen a million faces
and I've rocked them all
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:44, archived)

I want a Washburn acoustic, I borrowed my mates and it was shit hot
They're only about �120 too
(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:37, archived)

they're surprisingly good kit for the price
mine saw gig action, and is still playable 10 years later
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:41, archived)

ticket to mania + airfare

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:29, archived)

NARNIA?

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:31, archived)

+ wardrobefare

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:38, archived)

Totally winning that raffle

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:31, archived)

bought any tickets yet?

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:39, archived)

No, but I will
If I win, you can come with me
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:52, archived)

!
\o/
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:09, archived)

Just imagine it Manolith
Two men-about-town hitting Miami like a pair of greased cougars.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:12, archived)

Ok, tickets bought
Best of luck gentlemen
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:20, archived)

i got some too!

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:27, archived)

I reckon if you had enough money you could probably buy your way into the main event.

(

JackAction, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:42, archived)

rock vs cena vs manolith

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:44, archived)

Or Punk vs Jericho vs manolith. I prefer to think of this as the main event.

(

JackAction, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:52, archived)

or undertaker vs game vs manolith
actually, fuck it. i'll be in all 3
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:06, archived)

I've got a massive dog.
There's nothing I want but can't afford.

I should probably call my mother.

edit: massive dog
(

Moon Girl Technologies fuck off Team GB, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:34, archived)

:D
I want a massive dog
(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:41, archived)

you probably shouldn't call your mother a massive dog

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:43, archived)

that's what killed my mum :(
that and the lung cancer didn't help
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:46, archived)

and eating all those eastereggs, foil and all

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:30, archived)

you could buy it a nice bakelite kennel and wrap it up and write a little note 'for micah'

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:54, archived)

no I couldn't.
I could write it "FIVE Micah".
(

Moon Girl Technologies fuck off Team GB, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:03, archived)

My mum ain't doing that good :'(
Will you buy me a zoom to make me feel better?
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:36, archived)

here
www.b3tards.com/u/57cc9a3be7d0f074d018/zoom.gif
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:50, archived)

many thanks mongy.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:54, archived)

shit man i might draw myself a lemonade sparkle and sit down and join you

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:00, archived)

ice ice baby
www.b3tards.com/u/57cc9a3be7d0f074d018/sparkle.gif
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:03, archived)

I appreciate this mongy, you're a real angel.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:04, archived)

The ice lolly?
Sure!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:53, archived)

wow, this means I get 2 zooms!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:55, archived)

oh i get it, i though you meant a xoom!

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:01, archived)

I want to own my own pub,
Rather than run one for someone else,

Mother is pretty dead,
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:52, archived)

lots of formaldehyde and nice makeup?

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:55, archived)

Sorry to hear that Windus
I too would like to own a little pub. Maybe when I retire I can buy the one that's in Withnail & I.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:57, archived)

we should get a pub together,
We could have music and wrestling and beer and all sorts of nice stuff.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:03, archived)

Oh, that would be lovely
The Two Pigs. Or maybe not.
Hogs n Hats?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:07, archived)

well,
MMPS is already part of the pub plan, so it would be like Two Pigs in Shoes, or Pig Shoes Hats or something.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:11, archived)

I heart you.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:17, archived)

(.")-@ ("o)
That's me giving you a rose. I couldn't make you look any more Scottish, sorry.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:22, archived)

(.")-@ #=====("o)
That's me throwing up due to huge alcohol consumption.
SCOTZLOLZ
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:25, archived)

this looks like it needs a third panel,
And some sort dedicated puke comic.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:30, archived)

you're only a youngster though, there's still time for the pig's shoes to happen.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 14:59, archived)

I BELIEVE!

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:04, archived)

LOUDER!!!!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:05, archived)

A Beechcraft Starship
and a Jaguar XKR-S.

Closer to reality, i'd like a new watch and a better spray mask. But I can probably afford them if I put my back into it.

Alt: I'm assuming still dead. But I can check.
(thediscokingpin, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:44, archived)

lot of dead mums here today
i was gonna console you all, but i'm gonna have to fork out on flowers and chocolates later this month, you lucky git
(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:51, archived)

I'll pay your flowers and chocolates bill if you can bring my mum back
I was fond of her.
(thediscokingpin, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:56, archived)

cool, wheres she buried?

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 15:58, archived)

Cor, they both look pretty cool
Sorry about your Mum
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:10, archived)

Ok, well I think that's run its course
NEXT!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 16:20, archived)

Fuck QOTW,
I just had an argument with a chap because he nearly ran me over. He said that working on my car outside my house was a stupid thing to do, and it's not his fault he reversed in to me.
What idiots have you met recently? And why didn't you punch them in the gob.

Alt: I've got Friday off, what are you doing Friday? Can I come?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:04, archived)

It's free to go to RHS Garden Wisley tomorrow.
You should.
It's nice.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:06, archived)

A garden?
But I've got my own Garden, why would I want to go to someone elses, what if they're having a bbq with just close friends?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:08, archived)

It's not that kind of Garden.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:10, archived)

A whole fucking class of kids dressed as Harry fucking Potter.
That's what.
(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:48, archived)

How stupid.
stupidstupid stupid!
stupid stupidstustupid
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:54, archived)

i'm working friday
you can come if you like
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:10, archived)

Hey manolith
I'm having a cup of tea and a slice of cake.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:17, archived)

what do you do?
Can I have my own desk? I'm not making you tea, where are we going for lunch? What time is our break? Can my desk be by your desk? Do you mind if I take my shoes off? Where are the toilets? Is there a vending machine? Does it have Mars bars? What time do we finish? Shall we go for a beer afterwards? Ill get the first round in, what are you drinking? Do you think I'll be too drunk to drive? Can I sleep on your sofa?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:18, archived)

He's a stripper

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:22, archived)

And the rest?

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:25, archived)

That's down to his own descretion I'm afraid

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:29, archived)

d
s x
(

Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:02, archived)

i'm an IT tech
yeah, if you like. everybody makes tea at some point, you're not special. probably just to the canteen. lunch is at 12. no, sorry. that's fine, i do it. they're downstairs, or along the corridor if you want the less skanky ones. there are several. some of them, yeah. finish at 4.30 on a friday. i think we're already going for a beer afterwards. i'll have a pint of landlord, ta. maybe, i get the train home anyway. sure, although we've got a spare room at the moment so you can have a bed.
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:36, archived)

Well how do you explain the naked dancing?

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:38, archived)

it's to distract people from our terrible network infrastructure

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:40, archived)

WOAH NOW,
why can't my desk be by your desk?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:39, archived)

because all the desks near me are taken
sorry
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:40, archived)

Who do I have to sit next to then?

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:41, archived)

the water cooler

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:42, archived)

is there at least a pot plant or something?

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:51, archived)

are you suggesting we use our office to cultivate illegal drugs?!

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:56, archived)

You're not really selling it to me.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:57, archived)

well, i don't like being here so i don't see why you should

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:03, archived)

I don't want to offend you,
but even frisbees suggestion of going to talk to a dying man sounds better than your office.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:08, archived)

that's fine
i just answered your questions. i wasn't suggesting that this was somewhere you'd want to go
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:34, archived)

you've nearly got out of it,
just don't mention the bouncy castle
(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:41, archived)

Dude me outlook keeps asking for me windows password
fix it, jesus man, fix it, what do we pay you for, I'm not paid to know about this kind of shit, what the fuck is going on
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:44, archived)

fucks sake what are we paying you for

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:50, archived)

umm... hold on...
*shuffles papers*
ah yes... have you tried turning it off and on again?
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:56, archived)

Fucking useless
I turn it off every week! I hate you
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:57, archived)

oh god umm i... i...
can you check that the network cable is plugged in?
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:41, archived)

I've just done a survey on my journey with National Express
It's all go here, I tell you
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:18, archived)

cripes

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:40, archived)

I 'somewhat agreed' with most of their comments

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:00, archived)

You should have set harley on him.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:14, archived)

She did bark a little,
she was too busy sleeping really.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:15, archived)

I bet that scared him!
SHIT! they've got a fucking barking rat.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:18, archived)

He was a right prick though MMPS,
I'm glad I spotted him, or he'd have done a bit of damage.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:20, archived)

Did you nut him?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:22, archived)

no, he didn't get out of his car,
he drove off. I decided not to chase him.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:24, archived)

you should have jumped in the morris and sped after him.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:25, archived)

why are you so horrid to me?
:(
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:26, archived)

oh man, I wasn't even trying there :(

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:28, archived)

is this the end of pig shoes?!
tune in next week for the shocking conclusion
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:41, archived)

In other shocking news, Theoban is turning to the frisbee side of the force.
I envision about 200 comics, each dealing with calisthenics and vomiting
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:46, archived)

Still no answer...

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:05, archived)

You don't seem right good at vehicle accidents
I recommend investing in a horse
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:16, archived)

I'm trying to find stables at the moment that aren't shit and don't charge the earth.
It's not going very well.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:19, archived)

keep the horse in the pub.
that way, some jokes may become reality.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:20, archived)

All I'm doing tomorrow is working, and then I might start my mead off
You're welcome to attend
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:26, archived)

I like mead,
I'll have a look at flights
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:28, archived)

Going to try to make ten litres of it
IT WILL NOT WORK
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:32, archived)

Cor.
I likes a bit of mead.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:06, archived)

I've not had it for years, and I found a dead simple recipe, so I'll be giving it a shot
And in two months I'll be able to test if it's worked or not
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:10, archived)

Recipe please.
Link or gaz or otherwise
Thanks.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:36, archived)

Here
www.homebrewtalk.com/f80/joes-ancient-orange-mead-49106/

It's in American, but should be fairly simple to convert. We'll see.
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:36, archived)

I reckon you can just replace the oragnge / spices with anything you like
Or just go in with nothing for a plain mead, but that'd probably take longer to be ready cos you're not masking shitness with flavours
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:39, archived)

oragnge

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:42, archived)

oragngetnnge

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:43, archived)

it looks like that prison sock brewed thing
www.thesneeze.com/mt-archives/000373.php
(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:43, archived)

No mead for gludel

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:52, archived)

Woah.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:53, archived)

Come round and help me with my house

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:17, archived)

I'm pretty handy with a hammer,
any help?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:19, archived)

Hmm...not really
I think it'll be painting mainly.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:21, archived)

just let him come round and paint with his hammer.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:22, archived)

Woah

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:31, archived)

I also have Friday off
I'm driving to Barnsley, then Hinkley and then back home, you're welcome to come but you will have to sit in the back of a van with a wheel chair for company
(

M o D, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:24, archived)

Can't I sit in the wheelchair,
and attach a rope to the back of the van? We could create a new sport.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:25, archived)

I'm not sure my mate would allow his chair to be used for this
Still it's not like he can chase after us is it...
Ok sounds like a plan, can you be in Luton for 6AM?
(

M o D, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:33, archived)

I'm not promising anything yet,
not till the thread is over, might get some better suggestions, but so far, you're top.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:38, archived)

I reckon we should hire a bouncy castle

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:25, archived)

Why was this in the image results for "bouncy Castle funny"?
www.saynotocrack.com/img/toilet_racer.jpg
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:28, archived)

were you working on the road?
or on your driveway?
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:32, archived)

Dads driveway.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:36, archived)

That guy would have suffered my wrath and no mistake

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:41, archived)

I got quite shouty,
and waved my screwdriver at him, and he sped off.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:45, archived)

Saw this
And thought of you.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:38, archived)

How thoughtful
It scares me there's that many gullible cunts spending their cash on Apple products
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:40, archived)

I don't have a problem with Apple products.
I don't actually own any so the ones I've used were owned by the companies I worked for, but they did their job reasonably well and were user-friendly and intuitive. I don't buy into the marketing crap that they're somehow almost magical though so perhaps that's the difference.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:47, archived)

I'd disagree with almost everything you say
but this discussion has been had by millions of people worldwide, and is a conversational dead end.

Fortunately, Poland's economy is also strong. There are no worms in this apple.
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:55, archived)

How much Polish industry is actually German-owned?
I seem to recall about 20 years ago German companies being in a mad rush to acquire as much Eastern European industry as was possible.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:01, archived)

Quite a lot
but there's huge legislation about how much revenue foreign companies can remove from Polish-based firms, so even if the owners are German, the money stays here.
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:09, archived)

That's an excellent idea
Pity the Tories didn't include something like that last time round when they privatised all the utility companies.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:14, archived)

A girl I work with is looking at flats, and asked me what the difference between furnished and unfurnished is.

(

JackAction, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:33, archived)

Tell her it's something to do with the central heating

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:36, archived)

I laughed in her face for a full six hours.

(

JackAction, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:37, archived)

It's less than she deserves

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:38, archived)

Well go on Captain Smugtopus, tell us what the difference is

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:37, archived)

One allows dogs, and the other doesn't. Jesus, Theoban, not you too?

(

JackAction, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:38, archived)

I thought it was to do with the protective layer you were allowed to put on the woodwork
ah no that's varnished and unvarnished, nvm
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:39, archived)

You should set her up with Quinten,
guy needs some love.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:37, archived)

say it's a regional spelling of 'finished'
and that the unfurnished ones are missing a couple of walls
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:39, archived)

well everyone knows flats aren't worth anything unless they are david furnish accredited

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:41, archived)

tell her the first one has polished so much that it's really shiny and gleaming
and that it's the industry way of saying the kitchen has stainless-steel appliances
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:42, archived)

It's code
Furnished means that they will happily accept cosplayers as tenants, whereas unfurnished means "No furries."
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:49, archived)

I'm seeing a client to take his final wishes
Would you like to come? The junior doctors in this hospital are very tasty
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:40, archived)

Which hospital?

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:42, archived)

Soilent Greenfields Hospice

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:43, archived)

The Very Holy Hospital of Somethingorother.
I forget, ask me tomorrow yeah?
Mmm, hot doctors. Hoctors...
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:44, archived)

alright,
you're on the shortlist for now. I'm not playing Frisbee in our lunch break though, that's too far.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:46, archived)

That's cool, my frisbee-playing suit is in the drycleaners so I can't either.
Unless they don't mind me taking instructions in a hawaiian shirt and beachshorts.
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:49, archived)

More like final washes

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:44, archived)

*snort* I know, right?
Ooh, I have to buy Vicks. Thanks for reminding me
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:47, archived)

Only two people tried to kill me on my ride to my mum's
and the weather was nice. It was almost enjoyable. I have summer gloves. Much easier to fumble the indicator now. You can come and have tea at mine on Friday if you like, I'm waiting in for deliveries/pickups so I'm not doing anything. Maybe some advertising set-up.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:00, archived)

i'll fumble your indicator in a minute

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:02, archived)

CR3! HE'S DOING IT AGAIN

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:03, archived)

i'll do your again in a minute

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:32, archived)

hurrr hurrhurrr

(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:06, archived)

Weather here is buggery rubbish,
but we had a sunny saturday, and I missed the bike a lot.
Tea goes straight through me, if we were drinking tea all day I'd be worried I wouldn't make it home again without having to stop to wee on the side of the road. And I don't want lorry drivers to see my winky.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:06, archived)

No, they might think you were trying to entice them.
I'd like to find some nice roads to drive on. Ones with no cyclists or lorries or traffic. I don't think they exist near me.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:09, archived)

Avoid single track roads at all cost,
van drivers especially like to drive very fast in the middle of the road around blind corners, and that can ruin a set of leathers flinging yourself in to a hedge.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:15, archived)

I've got textiles
cheaper and warmer, you just look like a courier. I bought a leather jacket off ebay, it's rather small. A bit short in the body too. I dunno if I like it.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:25, archived)

but vans do like to pretend they haven't seen you, don't they?
they pull out in front of me a lot.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:25, archived)

I came to the conclusion eventually that some people just don't look.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:29, archived)

I shut my eyes when I drive.
It's a miracle I get anywhere.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:35, archived)

You can come and wait for a Virgin Media engineer at my house if you like
There has to be someone over 18 on the premises when they get here, so if you wait in for them I can fuck off down the pub.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:03, archived)

but then we won't be doing stuff together.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:07, archived)

There'd be little point taking you down a pub on your day off
That wouldn't be much of a break for you would it? I'll bring you back a bottle of lemonade and a pickled egg if that swings the deal.

This offer is subject to an expected phone call saying they can't make it today and will be coming round tomorrow instead. Watching the football last night was great fun thanks to the box deciding to reboot every ten minutes as it was activating my VirginPlus subscription- that despite my having been subscribed to the service for four years.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:12, archived)

I'll put you on the shortlist.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:15, archived)

I'm afraid you'll have to cross me off now
The engineer has actually turned up on the correct day and fixed the problem.
(

Lord Gnome, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:12, archived)

A man was shouting at me the other day
I didn't punch him in the face because he was crazy and homeless
(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 12:55, archived)

Just went to a guitar shop, tried something, did a cry
Came back to work
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:01, archived)

did a cry like ritchie blackmore?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=v0mXKsryNUM

or like a poor man who loves shiny things?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:05, archived)

More like the latter if I'm being honest
God damn it
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:08, archived)

Did you punch him or did you punk out like a pussy 'ole?

(

mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:04, archived)

HI!

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:16, archived)

WOAH!

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:19, archived)

!HAOW

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:21, archived)

iHVOM

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:25, archived)

WFTISTHISSHIT

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:45, archived)

YOUR MUM!
lol?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:46, archived)

HOOM!

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:55, archived)

there goes the neighbourhood

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:26, archived)

We won't survive this
/starwars
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 13:43, archived)

Help us celebrate World Book Day by ignoring books and voting for the new Question of the Week
HERE
(

Scaryduck squeezed an owl until an egg came out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:25, archived)

Can I ignore both?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:26, archived)

O< ----- Stay and quack a while.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:26, archived)

Quack off.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:27, archived)

O< ------ go shove a goose up your cockend and shit a golden egg

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:28, archived)

What a terrible man you are.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:30, archived)

That's a very specific insult
I approve!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:37, archived)

shut up
let's talk about books instead.

anyone reading/read anything good lately?
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:29, archived)

I'm still working my way through all the Harry Potters.
The books are better than the films.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:30, archived)

yes and getting punched in the face is better than getting stabbed

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:43, archived)

Um, yes, I suppose you're right.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:43, archived)

i'm implying that neither the books nor films are to my taste, here

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:50, archived)

I guessed.
I personally enjoy both. I'm not one of these fanatical people, but I think they're ok.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:55, archived)

I'm reading Moab Is My Washpot by Stephen Fry
It's ok. Funny and dry in equal measure.

Bit gloomy today Manolith. What can I do to raise my spirits?
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:31, archived)

Also, I was hoping to procure some rare herbs for my birthday
and I think that's not going to happen. BOO! HISS!
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:36, archived)

Cannabis isn't that rare.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:40, archived)

Bloody well is to me
I know very few people these days
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:41, archived)

Well I could get you some but getting it to you would be an issue, I'm busy.
*deals drugs online*
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:43, archived)

shocking behaviour, online

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:53, archived)

i'm not happy, i'm the registered forum drug dealer, mono is all over my turf here, naughty step the cunt

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:57, archived)

i think these have to be solved with violence, don't they?
i thought that was the law
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:58, archived)

It's ok, I'll step down.
I don't want to cause any trouble I was just wanting to help a brother out, yo.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:59, archived)

taking food out of my kids mouths here, this aint a joke man, i need those bens

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:00, archived)

you're a good man at heart, mono

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:02, archived)

I love you Mono

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:02, archived)

Let's do sex.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:03, archived)

Agreed

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:08, archived)

i'll get mortal wombat to underpin his extension with monos knees then

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:59, archived)

hey, amnesia haze, good bags, cant do the 3 for 50 no more tho, soz, credit crunch and all that jazz

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:56, archived)

That's cool man
Maybe next time
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:02, archived)

all cool, next time let me know and i'll post some off

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:06, archived)

i've read that. it's a good book
he had an interesting life
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:42, archived)

have a trifle.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:45, archived)

I'd fucking LOVE a trifle
I love you MMPS, you always know what to say.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:47, archived)

*winks and finger guns*

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:49, archived)

are you working from home today, hats?

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:49, archived)

Nah man, in the orifice

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:01, archived)

And in case anyone's considering breaking in
The house isn't empty. You cunts.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:02, archived)

ok, it would probably be a bad idea to strut about in the nip then

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:02, archived)

Well, I don't know...

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:09, archived)

I'm re-reading Dune at the moment
I enjoy this book greatly and that is my opinion and damnit I shall stick to it
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:47, archived)

You know what
This is a book that's been recommended to me dozens of times and I've never read it.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:47, archived)

I like the first one
The rest get turgid and then ridiculous when his son took over and shat over everything, but the first one I think is pretty good stuff
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:58, archived)

The only thing I remember from the film is some guy saying "I will take the manboy, oogh"
or was that something else.
I've heard the book is good though.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:48, archived)

I don't remember that being in the film
But the film really doesn't have much to do with the book
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:56, archived)

Maybe it were summit elsethen.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:57, archived)

Dunno, been a while since I seed it too

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:58, archived)

It stuck in my head because it was a silly line.
I remember nothing else.
Oh, aren't there worms.
It's like sci-fi tremors.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:00, archived)

When I was at school I had a row with a guy
that was convinced that movie was pronounced TREE-MAWS. Prick. Needless to say, I had the last, etc
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:04, archived)

Definitely.
Good film too.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:08, archived)

It is when Paul and Jessica are ambushed by Stilgar and his Fremen
*ahem*
(wimbley is feeling hungover, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:16, archived)

but have you seen anymore chebs today?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:50, archived)

yes, i saw a reference to tit monday and demand an explanation

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:52, archived)

About Tit Monday?

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:02, archived)

yes
YES
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:03, archived)

Tit Monday is a glorious day, the Sun shines, the birds start singing and the scent of fandan is on the breeze
And women everywhere get the call, the bell goes off in their heads that says 'today, today I should go out and flash my baps around more'

It starts the glorious Tit Week, before Tit Friday, when women everywhere start covering up their marvelous breasts, and thus begins the long, dark cold Tit Weekend.
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:05, archived)

oh boy, i can't wait!

(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:16, archived)

Yeah there was a pair out, but it was on a French lass and she always has them hanging out
Still no definitive word
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:56, archived)

as soon as you have any further info, please update.
gaz me if possible.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:58, archived)

never read it
it sounds a bit dry
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:59, archived)

Aye it can be a bit dusty at times

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:02, archived)

I tried to read it
my will deserted me halfway through.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:04, archived)

Guys can we stop these puns
I think we're dune here
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:05, archived)

the prices of e-books and the speed I can now go through them mean that I'm fast running out of Ian M. Banks, Stephen Baxter and Alastair Reynolds books
So I picked up Hyperion by Dan Simmons. I'm being pleasantly surprised.
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:54, archived)

christ, I bet you're a laugh down the pub.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:55, archived)

Jokes on you, I don't socialise!
Oh, wait
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:57, archived)

I still don't see an answer.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:56, archived)

Oh, sorry about that
What was the question?
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:58, archived)

What on earth is a non-career REME?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:05, archived)

aw shit, I like all these books
:(
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:07, archived)

Would you like to play some frisbee?

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:39, archived)

I read the first preacher GRAPHIC NOVEL
it was good
(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:03, archived)

former b3tan foldsfive leant me the whole series
i thought they were great, despite the fact that i accidentally read the second one first
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:04, archived)

former :(

(GluEid Saeed, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 11:26, archived)

but i dont wanna!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:55, archived)

it's ok, mongy
they can't make you do anything you don't want to
(

manolith - modomite, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:57, archived)

Apparently it's International Welsh-Day or something.
Unfortunately I don't know any pubs around here that sell Brains IPA and the rugby isn't on...so I guess I'll be eating a raw leek or something.

You know who you are, don't be shy. Come out and admit your welshness and tell me how you're celebrating today.
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:10, archived)

It's also world book day.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:11, archived)

Will you be reading any World-Books today?

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:12, archived)

I made my son a costume for school.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:13, archived)

Is he going as either an Atlas or a Welshman?
This is important
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:14, archived)

he's going as a bull.
ties in with the book he's taking.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:18, archived)

Does he have a pair of horns and will he be doing bull-runs down the corridors?
I think he should
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:25, archived)

He does have horns, and a duster.
As for the running, I don't think that's allowed in school.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:29, archived)

School used to be fun :(

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:30, archived)

My eldest is going as George from the Marvelous Medicine book
He's got a bucket with loads of crazy crap stuck to it.

/forgetful-parents-working-well-under-pressure
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:07, archived)

I hope it's actual crap.
The whole two hats clan, taking it in turns to squat over the bucket.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:08, archived)

Oh yes
Nothing discourages bullies like carrying a bucket full of shit into school
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:16, archived)

I take a bucket of shit to work.
Less people come to be about problems that way.
I also never shower, just incase people try to collar me when I'm away from my bucket.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:22, archived)

I try to look extremely stressed all the time
That way people are less likely to give me more work
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:25, archived)

I've just sent myson to school in his pyjamas for this.
All the male teachers were wearing animal print onesies.
(

Mrs. Sp@m, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:17, archived)

as long as it's not animal thongs.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:19, archived)

Onesies are more disturbing.

(Dreadful Shit, or get off the internet., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:21, archived)

my surname is very Welsh
and I quite like leeks.
(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:15, archived)

I love leeks. Squeakiest vegetable.

(

agent binkybee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:18, archived)

Leeks are great in a pie.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:20, archived)

Morning

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:20, archived)

Had to leave for dinner yesterday, soz.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:21, archived)

You inconsiderate prick.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:15, archived)

So how many nuts and bolts did you count while you were serving?
I bet it must have been hundreds!
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:24, archived)

I'm not a waiter.
What was I supposed to be serving?
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:32, archived)

Going on about food again?
Oh Mono
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:56, archived)

Wow, you are actually more retarded than I originally thought.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:57, archived)

Being called retarded by a non-career REME is possibly the worst thing that's ever happened to me
This is going to be a TERRIBLE day :(((
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:04, archived)

What on earth is a non-career REME?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:05, archived)

rene eats michele's enchante?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:07, archived)

Reginald Eradicates MMPS's Erection

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:14, archived)

Yeah, I'm most certainly the retarded one Mono
Go play with your lego blocks and pretend you're doing something meaningful
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:07, archived)

Why didn't you answer my question?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:13, archived)

Hey guys, on a completely unrelated note, has anyone seen that episode of South Park where Timmy and Jimmy have a fight?

(

JackAction, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:14, archived)

A less predicatable joke would've been funnier.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:19, archived)

You fat ballb...
Oh
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:42, archived)

Stop coming and going, you're making me dizzy

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:44, archived)

that's what SHE said!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:47, archived)

Did she?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:47, archived)

yes

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:48, archived)

Yes?

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:51, archived)

YES!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:52, archived)

Woah.
OK.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:54, archived)

Alright dick noise
Sorry, keep getting distracted today
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:05, archived)

It seem to only be me and frisbee here, and he's trying his hardest to insult me and failing massively.
I need someone here who I can banter with :(
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:06, archived)

Ignored by MONO! :'(

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:07, archived)

You hadn't posted for ages.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:14, archived)

HEY!

(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:51, archived)

i'd shoving daffodil bulbs up my ring

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:16, archived)

yaki da!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:18, archived)

y w
(

Frisbee Attorney - at - lol, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:26, archived)

An actual Welsher once told me she'd never heard of this greeting
I was flabbergasted. Other Welshers have since told me it's really. Although it's more like Iechy Da. Fucking Taffs.
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 10:26, archived)

I've just seen the new links-popular thing on the fp.
It means that if everyone here "liked" this: 207.44.242.20/links/Prussian_Window:2
There would be shit on the front page. My shit. All over the fp.
(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:26, archived)

fucking spambots.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:28, archived)

Yes I am. And I don't care who knows it.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:29, archived)

HEY BM
Morning, you?
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:29, archived)

Yeah?
Foggy?
(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:30, archived)

I couldn't tell whether there were less people on the road this morning or they were just lost in the fog.
I might punch someone.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:31, archived)

I got the new houser looking lovely yesterday.
Kids have trashed it already?
(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:32, archived)

Kids are shit.
They'd make a great bolognese though.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:33, archived)

junior masterchef says otherwise.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:34, archived)

*hilariousness*

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:35, archived)

That Heston thing on the FP done me a laughing?

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:35, archived)

I likeied that his face was ROFL?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:37, archived)

Yes.
the monkey think too?
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:39, archived)

I'm totally going to buy a load of spam, sculpt it into a robot and fuck its mouth now.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:29, archived)

have a threesome with a trifle cyborg.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:30, archived)

Fucking trifborgs.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:31, archived)

go for broke and shag a custard cream android.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:32, archived)

There was shit all over the front page recently.
But literally shit
A big picture of someone's poo.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:29, archived)

All this talk of poo makes me want one.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:34, archived)

I mean want to go for one.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:34, archived)

you should wear an adult nappy, then you could shit at your desk and post here.
I'm sure we'd all heart a blow by blow account of excrement slipping out your bumhole.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:42, archived)

or i could just use my phone

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:58, archived)

why would you want to shit on your phone?
are you german?
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:59, archived)

Yes
*nAzi salutes*
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:00, archived)

Do a nazi salute next time your on the bog.
ein volk
ein bumholen
ein poopen
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:02, archived)

LOLWIN
i.imgur.com/07FAW.jpg
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:03, archived)

woah! the sun's fallen out of orbit?
has nasa alerted bruce willis and the fucking huge guy from the green mile?
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:07, archived)

just fucking die already you shit.
Nah, i clicked it.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:30, archived)

It puts the sprinkles on the trifle.

(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:31, archived)

How?
There's no like thingy button thing for me.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:32, archived)

baldmonkeys link signs you out for some reason.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:36, archived)

black magik! sorcery!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:38, archived)

GTG!
BRB!
X
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:46, archived)

enjoy your wank.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:46, archived)

Stupid proxy bollocks what a fucking useless fat prick

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:42, archived)

FORGET THAT
I think it might be Tit Monday
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:52, archived)

WOAH!! shit just got real.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:53, archived)

It's dead nice out, and I saw some cracking wabs in the lift this morning
More news on this as it happens
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:54, archived)

be sure to update as soon as you can.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:55, archived)

Won't be until lunch I reckon
That'll be the soonest I can get out and verify
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:56, archived)

Just be sure to update the moment you can.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:57, archived)

You know I wouldn't leave you hanging with news of this import

(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:59, archived)

bless you Theo.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:59, archived)

Gonna do some work now
For a while
(

Theoban This isn't what I ordered..., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:01, archived)

I saw a girl trying to bring about Tit Monday all by herself last week.
Poor cow looked like she was going to lose a nipple to frostbite.
(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:48, archived)

Hope this finds you well?

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:53, archived)

hi

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:59, archived)

Fine, whatever.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 9:12, archived)

Come on soldiers, hands off cocks and on with socks
What's your special military skill?
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 6:40, archived)

morning grrry.
i can drink rum like a seaman.

*awaits strikethrough*
(

janet aylia proud resident of the fletcher memorial home, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 6:53, archived)

I've never been a fan of rum tbh
Or semen, to be fair.
In other news, Good Morning Janet!
(

mns I do nothing at all and let my legs go fizzy, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 7:00, archived)

You mouthwrong
Rum is awesome.
(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:04, archived)

only dark rum, bacardi can go fuck itself.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:08, archived)

Damn straight.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:08, archived)

and anyone who has rum with cola is a fucking monghead

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:09, archived)

*dark rum fives*

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:09, archived)

I can buff up quite a shine on a pair of shoes
Oh, and shoot the wings off a bee at 20 yards.
Put me down as a sniper
(

mns I do nothing at all and let my legs go fizzy, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 6:58, archived)

I can put it up a fuzzy wuzzy.
They don't like it.
(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 7:25, archived)

I have seen Full Metal Jacket 5 times.

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 7:43, archived)

I'm a lover, not a fighter
A lover with a flick knife
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 7:44, archived)

Well being an ex-squaddie... I'M AMAZING AT EVERYTHING

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 7:55, archived)

were you in the catering corps?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:09, archived)

No such thing.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:09, archived)

I was in REME

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:09, archived)

rotund easter MONO! egg?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:10, archived)

rupert everett marry me?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:14, archived)

Royal Electrical and Mechanical Engineers.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:15, archived)

so you wired plugs for the army.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:18, archived)

Yes.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:20, archived)

tell me some army stories MONO!

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:25, archived)

This one time at army camp I stuck a bayonet up someone's pussy.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:30, archived)

was he angry?

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:33, archived)

poor MONO! ptsd from peeling spuds :'(

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:10, archived)

I can srep on mines like a boss!

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 7:58, archived)

morning pigster.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:20, archived)

'ello
How's it?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:28, archived)

smashing until that prick BM ruined this thread.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:32, archived)

what a fat ballbag.

(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:43, archived)

they should deport him back to Ballbagonia.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:44, archived)

I'd be in Intelligence, what with my smarts and all.

(

Noit happy baby orangutan, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:25, archived)

The ability to sit at a desk and occasionally make tea is all you need.

(

MONO!, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:30, archived)

says the guy that changed the light bulbs.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 8:41, archived)

/talk doesn't have enough ASCII-Art. More of you should create wonders like this:


                                                                 

                       ░░░░                                      
                     ░▒▒▒▒▒▒░                       ▒▒▒░         
                     ▒▒▒░░░▒░░                   ░░░░░░▒▒        
                    ▒▒▒░░░░░▒░░                 ▒░░░  ░▒▒▒       
                   ░▒▒▒▒░░░░░░░                 ▒▒░░░░▒▒▓█░      
                   ▒▒▓▒░▒░░░░░░░              ░░░░░░▒▒▒▓██▒      
                   ▒██▒░▒░░░░▒▒▒              ░▒░░░▒▒▒▓███░      
                   ░▓█▒▒▒░░░░░▒░              ▒▒░░░░░░░▒█▓       
                   ░▒█▒▒▒░░░░▒▒░             ░▒░░░░░░░▒█▓░       
                   ░▒█▓▒▒░░░░▒▒░             ░▒▒▒▒░░▒▒██▒        
                   ░▒██▒░░░░░▒▒░░             ░▒▒░░░░▓██▒        
                   ░▒███▓▒▒░░░█▒░              ▒▒░░  ▒███        
                   ▒▒█▓██▒▒░ ▒▓▓▒░             ░░ ▒▒███▓▒        
                  ░▒▒█▒▒▒░  ▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▒░           ▒███████▒        
               ░▒▓████▒▓▒▒ ▒▓▓▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▒ ░   ░░░█████████▒        
              ▒███▓███▓▒▒▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░░ ░░▒██████████▓        
             ░██▓█▓███▓▒░▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░░░░████████████▓        
             ▒████████▓▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░▒█████████████▓        
             ▒█████████▒▒▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒░██████████████▓        
             ████████▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓███████████████▒        
            ░████████▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓████████████████         
            ▒██████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓███████████████▒         
            ██████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██▓█▓▓▓▓██████████████░         
           ▓█████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓████▓▓▓▓█████████████▒          
          ░██████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓███▓█▓▓▓██████████████           
          ░█████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██████▓▓▓████████████░           
          ▒█████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█████▓▓▓▓██████████▒            
          █████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓███████▓▓██████████▓             
         ░██████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█████▓▓▓▓▓▓██████████░             
          ▒████████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██▓▓▓▓▓▓█████████▒              
           ▒████████████▓██▓▓▓▓▓█▓▓▓▓▓▓▓█████████▓               
               ░▒██▓████▒▓▓▓▓██▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓██████████░               
                ░███▓▓▓▓▓█████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓███████████                
                ▒█████▓▓▓▓▓██▓▒▒▓▓▓▓████████████▒                
                ▒███████▒▒▓▓██▒▒▒▓▓█████████████░                
                █████████▓███▓▒▒▒██████████████▓                 
                █████▓█████▓▓▓▓█▓██████████████░                 
               ░██████▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▓▓▓████████████▓                  
               ▒████████▓▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒█████████████░                  
               ▒████████▓▓▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▓███████████▓                   
               ██████████▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒███████████░                   
               ████████████▓▒▒▒▒▒▒██████████▓                    
               ███████████▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒██████████░                    
               ██████████▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒██████▒                     
               ▒█████████▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓                      
               ▒█████████▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░                      
               ▒██████████▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░                      
               ▒▓▓▓██▓████▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░                      
               ▒▓▒▒▒▓▒▓█░█▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒                       
               ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒█ █▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓█▒▒▒▒▒▒▒                       
               ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓ ▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▒▒░                       
               ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒█▓▒▒▒▒░                       
               ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒░ ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒█▒▒▒▒░                       
               ░▓▒▒▒▒▒▒░ ░▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒                       
               ░▓▒▒▒▒▒▒░ ░▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▒▒▓▒▒▒▒                       
               ░▓▒▒▒▒▒▒   ▓▒▒░▒▒▒▓▓▒▒▒▓▒▒▒▒                      
                ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░  ▓▒▒░▒▒▒▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒                      
                ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒   ▒▓▒▒░▒▒▒█▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒▒                     
                ▒▓▓▒▒▒▒   ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒░█▓▒▒▓▒▒▒▒▒░                    
                ▓▓▓▒▒▒▒   ▒█▒▒▒▒▒ ▒█▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒                    
                ▓█▓▒▒▒▒   ░██▓▒▒▒░░█▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒░                   
                ▒█▓▒▒▒▒    ▒▒▒▒▒▒░ ██▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒▒                   
                ░█▓▓▒▒▒░   ▒▓▒▒▒▒░ ░█▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒                   
                 █▓▓▒▒▒░   ▒▓▒▒▒▒▒  █▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒░                  
                 ▓▓▓▓▓▒░   ░▒▒▒▒▒░  ▒█▓▓▒▓▒▒▒▒▒                  
                 ▓▓▓▓▓▒░   ░▒▒▒▒▒▒  ░██▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▒                  
                 ▒▓▓▓▓▒░   ░▓▒▒▒▒▒   ▓███▓▒▒▒▒▒░                 
                 ▒▓▓▓▒▒░   ░▓▒▒▒▒░   ▒████▒▒▒▒▒▒                 
                 ▒▓▓▓▓▒░   ░▓▒▒▒▒░    ████▓▒▒▒▒▒                 
                 ▒▓▓▓▓▒░    █▒▒▒▒░    ░███▓▓▒▒▒▒░                
                 ▒█▓▓▓▓     █▓▒▒▒░     ▒███▓▓▒▒▒▒                
                ░████▓▒▒    █▓▒▒▓░     ▒█▓▓▓▒▒▒▒▒░               
                ░█████▒▒    █▓▓▒▒░    ░██▓▒▓▓▒▒▒▒░               
                 ▒▓▓▓▓▒░   ░█████▒ ░▒████▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▓▓               
                 ▒▒▒▓▓▒░    ░▓▒▒▒▒▓██████▒  ░░▒▓██░              
                ░░░░▒▒▒░     ▒░░░▒▓█▓█████▒▒▒▓▓███░              
              ░░░░░░░▒▒▓     ░░░░░░█████▓▒███████▓░              
             ░▒▒▒░░▒▒▒░      ▒▒▒░░░▒▒▒▒▒░░░░                     
              ░░░░           ▒▒▒▒▒░

(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 1:55, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/7458167
(

mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 2:52, archived)

That is quite detailed.
/board would appreciate that.
(Dave Trouser aHR0cDovL3Rpbnl1cmwuY29tLzdrazM1amE, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 3:06, archived)

we've cut down on the ascii art ever since all those links to cancer came up

(

Lightguy, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 4:04, archived)

I just spilled half a bottle of peach schnapps
and most of it went on my top and i think it's ruined.

How have you ruined your clothes with low-rent alcohol?
(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:10, archived)

why do you have peach schnapps?
are you 14?
(

mictoboy, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:12, archived)

Careful now.

(

Mu utter hypocrite, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:15, archived)

I can answer this with one simple word: Girl

(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:15, archived)

straight, or with a mixer?

(

mictoboy, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:17, archived)

Is this a threesome joke?

(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:20, archived)

if it is, i don't know the punchline

(

mictoboy, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:34, archived)

"Shaken, not stirred."

(

Gvpyczjppcl oo-ooo oo-ooo oo-oo-ooo oo-oo BARBRA STREISAND, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:57, archived)

what does this have to do with paint?

(GluEid Saeed, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:05, archived)

JMG.

(

Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Thu 1 Mar 2012, 0:49, archived)

oh man davey jones is dead :(

(

janet aylia proud resident of the fletcher memorial home, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:13, archived)

yes, but didn;t you read my post?
THAT is a problem.
He'll never know my pain.
(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:16, archived)

not now, anyway

(

mictoboy, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:17, archived)

The lucky ones die young

(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:21, archived)

Terrible racism.

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:16, archived)

i just blah blah blah
that blah blah blah to question number two?

well i blah blah blah
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:21, archived)

alri-blah

Let's see how you like it.
(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:27, archived)

wat?

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:37, archived)

if this is something about the local elections i ust chuck that shit in the bin, no offence

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:46, archived)

you do what?
You ungrateful shit.
Hitler was burnt at the stake on easter monday so you could vote.
(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:48, archived)

That's given me a thought, you know how a leap year is every 4 years, is it true to say the olympics happens every time there is a leap year?

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:03, archived)

not in the past i dont think, the greeks had a different calender

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:07, archived)

I'm gonna put a reminder in my phone for 2016 and 2020 to check to see if they olympics are on those years.
I'll get back to you with that.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:09, archived)

Put one in for 2100 too.

(

Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:11, archived)

as a londoner i'm proud an want to welcome everyone to come and enjoy the olympics
but as a londoner i fucking hate tourists, piss off
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:12, archived)

I only come down for the warm welcome but if that's going to be cancelled in future I won't bother.
I can go to Liverpool or somewhere.
(

Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:13, archived)

enoy the wonders of the north, empty up there, the cunts are all in london on the dole

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:29, archived)

I'm pretty sure they've got their own dole office in Liverpool.
I saw a programme about it on TV once. The woman behind the counter had a father with a gambling habit and an alcoholic brother. Her mother lived at the top of the tower block and had to work to pay for the gambling and alcohol. They didn't have a car between them. Billy thought it was dead sad and offered to sell her his van.
(

Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:32, archived)

if this is a sitcom i dont know it?
it was a bit like 'bread' at the start, but with more pathos
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:34, archived)

http://youtu.be/rDbW1TFc8eo

(

Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:38, archived)

where in gods name did you pull that out from? i'm impressed, i fucking hate bread tho

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:50, archived)

I think if I was going to drink shots of peach schnapps out of a ladies' navel, I'm not sure if it's better off a fat bird of a skinny one.
A fat bird you'll get more out of each shot, but it would probably have some sweat build up in it.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:49, archived)

You have to weigh up the pros and cons, bu tthen factor in this:
Inny or outy?

The dilemma gets bigger
(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:52, archived)

Do you get fat birds with outies?
I know you get the slutty ones who've been knocked up (which is a whole other ballpark), but I don't think your generic fat bird can have an outie... ditto goes for fat blokes and their willies.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:01, archived)

I don't know, is the truth.
I assume you do, but i've never found myself looking at fat girls so I can't be sure.
(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:04, archived)

Surely you've been in a lockroom after a 'pilartays' or 'spinning' lesson?

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:08, archived)

I think 'pilartays' should go on that blog of yours mate!
That's a belter, that one!
(Pilates)
(

mns I do nothing at all and let my legs go fizzy, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 6:56, archived)

i'd go for a really fat chick that could hold a pint of it, she'd be well up for it and you'd be pissed enough to bang her
skinny chick you'd keep having to top up to get a buzz on
(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:52, archived)

Thing is though, and I'm playing devil's advocate here... have you ever seen a fat bird excited or laugh when naked?
It would be like depth-charging inside a lava lamp.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:59, archived)

Scalding hot, with big globs of melted wax?

(

Gvpyczjppcl oo-ooo oo-ooo oo-oo-ooo oo-oo BARBRA STREISAND, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:00, archived)

Nah', all wibbly wobbly. I want to edit my post now to say "insdie a lava lamp during an earthquake".

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:02, archived)

Like a 20-ton tank of jelly on a rough road in deepest December.

(

Gvpyczjppcl oo-ooo oo-ooo oo-oo-ooo oo-oo BARBRA STREISAND, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:19, archived)

I got lambrini all over my best sweater vest

(GluEid Saeed, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:02, archived)

well classy

(misusscompiler was sent back in time to kill Sarah Connor, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:05, archived)

I spilled a Pimms and lemonade with cucumber, strawberries, lemon, lime and mint all over my boyfriends cock.

(

mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:05, archived)

I'VE LOST MY (VERY EXPENSIVE) SUNGLASSES

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:09, archived)

Your cleaner probably moved them again.
Or they're by your private swimming pool. Or in one of the taxis that you get paid for by the government.
(

BraynDedd is a cunt Jesus, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:19, archived)

That was a great day.
We should ban janet and then start being really nice to noobs so in a few months time, we can ridicule them for longer before they leave.
(

mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:21, archived)

i got martini on my tankini

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:14, archived)

i spilled egg nog all down my speedos

(

Lightguy, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 23:22, archived)

I got shitted on ALDI beer and got with someone on their period and ruined my jumper.

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 0:09, archived)

Is it Archers?
Or a no name brand?
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 0:19, archived)

The other day I went out
I found a massive flower so i stuck it to my shirt, it is now stained. I was drunk
(

Major Turd Former Foolius, Thu 1 Mar 2012, 1:07, archived)

Either fill this thread with tributes to whichever Monkee it was that died, or use ASCII images to make /board look shit.

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:25, archived)

OR SUTIN

(

mns I do nothing at all and let my legs go fizzy, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:28, archived)

I'm just glad it wasn't Micky Dolenz, or my alternate facebook account would be fucked.

(

BraynDedd is a cunt Jesus, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:28, archived)

You're Monkey Dolenz?

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:29, archived)

The one that just added you, yes.

(

BraynDedd is a cunt Jesus, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:46, archived)

Dude, like, how did you know my name?

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:48, archived)

Internet Columbo strikes again.

(

BraynDedd is a cunt Jesus, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:49, archived)

Hey, if you want a timeline full of shit about Irish politics and charities, that's your business.

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:50, archived)

I never look at that account anymore really.

(

BraynDedd is a cunt Jesus, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:56, archived)

That may be for the best.

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:59, archived)

Can I just post links to Frank Sinatra YouTube vids?

(

Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:29, archived)

I see no reason not to.

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:30, archived)

http://youtu.be/Fz6grruIJLA

(

Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:36, archived)

Hey hey, Who's the monkees?

(

Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:32, archived)

Not as many people as yesterday.

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:34, archived)

do the monkey with me


          __
     w  c(..)o   (
      \__(-)    __)
          /\   (
         /(_)___)
         w /|
          | \
          m  m

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:40, archived)

I'll do the monkey with you, young man,
*shakes fist*
*mutters something about the war*
(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:47, archived)

                         I apeologise for any offence caused  
                         /
                 _
             ,.-" "-.,
            /   ===   \
           /  =======  \
        __|  (o)   (0)  |__      
       / _|    .---.    |_ \         
      | /.----/ O O \----.\ |       
       \/     |     |     \/        
       |                   |            
       |                   |           
       |                   |          
       _\   -.,_____,.-   /_         
   ,.-"  "-.,_________,.-"  "-.,
  /          |       |          \  
 |           l.     .l           | 
 |            |     |            |
 l.           |     |           .l             
  |           l.   .l           | \,     
  l.           |   |           .l   \,    
   |           |   |           |      \,  
   l.          |   |          .l        |
    |          |   |          |         |
    |          |---|          |         |
    |          |   |          |         |
    /"-.,__,.-"\   /"-.,__,.-"\"-.,_,.-"\
   |            \ /            |         |
   |             |             |         |
    \__|__|__|__/ \__|__|__|__/ \_|__|__/

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:47, archived)

that is lovely, i was going to post an alright thread, but i will sit and look at this for a while, thanks

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:51, archived)

Give it half an hour.
I've got to go and sort out a few things and then I'll be back for the alright thread. I'm excited already.
(

Neptune A dole queue dosser and foul mouthed chav., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:52, archived)

  alright?
      /
O(*_*)O

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:53, archived)

yeah, you ruined the moment there, i'll never understand why people do that, no offence

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:55, archived)

this will help, i hope

                 .-"""-.
               _/-=-.   \
              (_|a a/   |_
               / "  \   ,_)
          _    \`=' /__/
         / \_  .;--'  `-.
         \___)//      ,  \
          \ \/;        \  \
           \_.|         | |
            .-\ '     _/_/
          .'  _;.    (_  \
         /  .'   `\   \\_/
        |_ /       |  |\\
       /  _)       /  / ||
      /  /       _/  /  //
      \_/       ( `-/  ||
                /  /   \\ .-.
                \_/     \'-'/
                         `"`
sexy monkey?

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:57, archived)

wank monkey? *skunk eyes yet again

(

mongychops handbrake?, that's not how i roll, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:00, archived)

i think he's just suggestively saying hello

(quentin to the 12 people ignoring me: I DON'T EVENCARE :'(, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 22:04, archived)

It's a Jolie monkey!

(

executiverocker only wears C&A, Fri 2 Mar 2012, 0:02, archived)

rip andy serkiss

(

Lightguy, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:58, archived)

end of my fucking tether.
alright?
(

janet aylia proud resident of the fletcher memorial home, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:24, archived)

'cus you're ev-ry where too me, and when I close my eyes, it's you I see.
/ac
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:27, archived)

Bad timing.

(

Dr Preference beveragonormative hegemonarrative, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:27, archived)

wossa matter janet?

(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:30, archived)

all right ?
Hahahaha
(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:46, archived)

CLASSIC BALDMONKEY
(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:53, archived)

not really, you chubby spastic

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:54, archived)

Piss up a rope you fat ballbag

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:55, archived)

I sold a BMW today to some idiot that paid £12 for a rubber ring
HAHAHAHAHA!
(

planearm, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:02, archived)

BLACK MAN'S WILLY!!!!!
HA HAHA HA HAHA HA HAHA
(

baldmonkey 84 not out, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:05, archived)

fat ballbag

                                                                                                                                                                                                 8
                                                                                                                                                                                                       8
                                                                                             ,?                                                                                                        8
                                                                                                .                                                                                                      8
                                                                                                 ?D                                                                                                    8
                                                                    .                             8?                                                                                                   8
                                                               ,?$=                    ?.         O?                                                                                                   8
                                                          ~$D$=                         O    O~  :8                                                                                                    8
                                                     DO?                                  ..    IO                                                                                                     8
                                                  8$,                                  ,?$$7$I~~~7I7                                                                                                   8
                                              ,DM8                                 $DM.             D                                                                                                  8
                                           OMM,                             :I8MO?       ~          .D                                                                                                 8
                                        MM$                            ,IM8=        ~,    O  I       O?                                                                                                8
                                    $M8,                           ?MM,              ?I    8 ?:     .8                                                                                                 8
                                 $$7                            ?D=                  . 7   =$7    OI8O                                                                                                 8
                                                              ?$                       :I   7  ~O   8                                                                                                  8
                                                           ,M: ~~     $,                ==  ,~    MM                                                                                                   8
                                                        OM7    ~,     .                  7      M7                                                                                                     8
                                                     8MI       ?=     ?.                     MM=                                                                                                       8
                                                  OD7          .7 ,I   I                 =DMMM$=                                                                                                       8
                                               :88              ~? ~=I ?~            ,MMO?      M:                                                                                                     8
                                            ~M=                  ,   I~.~         7M7 =O~        MI                                                                                                    8
                                        ?DMI                      ~I   .?     ?MM~    8  7     ~ .M                                                                                                    8
                                    =I~?~                                 =DMI     ?   O:     .D  M.                                                                                                   8
                                    I?~                               78M7,       .~,   $,   O=  O8                                                                                                    8
                                                                  :DMM,             I7   8$D~   DM                                                                                                     8
                                                               ~MM~                  ?         D                                                                                                       8
                                                           ..7M=     ,                ?      MMMMMMD                                                                                                   8
                                                         O::M.      :  I:             ,   DM??  ~=  MMM                                                                                                8
                                                       I,$MI     ,  ,7                 ~MM ~~,I, ?I,   8M8                                                                                             8
                                                     : ,8            .I  $           ?M?  : ,      ~.  .  M8                                                                                           8
                                                 :7= 8M,          I   7~ ?        ,MD,                     ,MM                                                                                         8
                                                =7.?M              I   == .     MM~                           MM                                                                                       8
                                                  O                 ,$  .   ~MM=                                8:                                                                                     8
                                              .8O,                        ~M8 ~~                                 ?M~                                                                                   8
                                             I:                          M77 $  7                                  I.                                                                                  8
                                           8,                         ?MM~= I  O                                    8M                                                                                 8
                                        ,?                           =D? , I ~7 I~                                    D$                                                                               8
                                                               .7,  MM= = ??,7    ~                                    =                                                                               8
                                                             ?$   MM$     ?      , =I                                                                                                                  8
                                                            ~  =MMMMMMMMMMMM$=:       I                                 I~                                                                             8
                                                         ?~,  7$,           ~::?MM8   ??                                ,I                      =                                                      8
                                                        7,  OM?                    MM7    .                              8.                    ~$                                                      8
                                                     $?   ,M                       MD?M$  I.                             $=                    D                                                       8
                                                     =  8M7                      7M II: DM  ~                            I:        ~=         =                                                        8
                                                  ~8.  M                        MM??$ ,,~.M, ~~,                                   I         OD                                                        8
                                                 ?   M8                        8M?   .I,~?:?D::I                         ?7       ~7        8O                                                         8
                                                   DM                        7M$       = ~~~ I  ?.                      I8        I~        I                                                          8
                                              =I  M,                        MD            ?~~8M, ?I                     O I       D~      ,M                                                           8
                                              , OM                        :M ~7             = OI   I                  ~M 8        8~     ~M=                                                           8
                                            I7:M7                        MM O~  ~              DID  .  ~             M8 I         D~   D:MI                                                            8
                                           ?  8                        :M, ~                   ,7 OD    ~7          M ~8          7=  $,MD                                                             8
                                            MD                        MM: $   ~,                O ~ ?=   :        ?M,M,           ?7 ~7 M                                                              8
                                          ?I                         D?  ~~    $                 D=~      :      M  7              8 I IO                                                              8
                                        MM                         7M8  ?,                        ?M      ~       ~M                 7 M                                                               8
                                      IM                          MM    7?  O                       MI           O$                  ~~M                                                               8
                                    M7                           8$ ~ I ~    ~7$                      =          I                    OM                                                               8
                                  ID                            MM ?, =7 =                                      I                     =M                                                               8
                                 7                             MM~ ~I   O        =?                 O.  ,      :D                     =M                                                               8
                              O7                              =M  ? I     I7       O7~           =  7  =       D                   ?  ,M                                                               8
                                                             IM ~ == 7      =~        ?$7    ,?.I  .I 7       $~                 .?,   D.                                                              8
                                                            $M8 ~~ .O?         :$~               ~.  $        $                :I. =~  II                                                              8
                                                            MD ~ =    I?           $=:     ,? =,    7    ?    :                  , ,  ?=D                                                              8
                                                           ,M  $? :     .=             ~~    ?:~=   ~  $ ~.                   O7   I ,. M                                                              8
                                                           M.7   8 ,        ,             =.    ?. ~ ,~ . $I.        ~777?    , ==$.  $ M$                                                             8
                                                          8M ,,   ?D?        $7~              I 7  $ =      ~,               .:  :I ~ ? IM.                                                            8
                                                         IMM, ,      .$7        ,~$=       ~?= ?  I: =.    ,I$  :           I7     ?   7 MO                                    .DMMMMDO$OMMM?          8
                                                         DM=$~ .         $?=,         I=  ~     7II. ,I ?      ,,,~~ ~? .,,   ~7 I ~ I= ?7M.                              ,IDMO7            ~M         8
                                                        ,MM   8I~           ,$88?.      :7 .,    ?=====?~?                  .77   .I8 I= IMI                       ,=?O8OMM?                  :        8
                                                        ?M8 ?, O$ ,.              7O$7~    .,,   I~ ?  O~ O~II       ,  ? $~: ?OI=  = ?,$?DM                ,~==D8=   MMO                    ~         8
                                                        ?MD  =~   DD88.?7 D = ~=, ,     ~?778  8,I~.=~:      :         ?$7O88~   ,I~?   ? =M         ~88I.  8I     ~MM.                     =M         8
                                                        =MMD   I:,     ID,,,,.   , =$ ~ ,? 7  D,=:,~$7~:       ,    ,,        . ,I= ~    I M  :DD$?:     M?       OM~           OMMMD$$7DMO$M          8
                                              II$DMMDMMM?M? 7O, I=            .~O7~   .~=~$?O ? =.~=~ ?8==:              .~:~ I ?. =,  I ??M7:        ?DI      :MM?          MM$          ?MD          8
                                         ?DMM7     ,~.  MM8    8~ ?                    =~  I~ 7? ~,,~?.=  7$~ .,   ~~ ~$,O $O$,~D?   . ?I8MM      ,7MD  ~   ,DMM ,=?      MM=               MM         8
                                     =MM~              , =M I~I   8$:    :   .  ~ ? $,?  ~, ~= ,   ~ =O?.~.      7D8     ~=$$7     $  7 O  M   7MD     .I IM8~    ?:$ .MM?                  7M         8
                             ~::IODM$                .?$ :MM  .~~     =$8$I8O=?D$87IOD78O7,,  O~ ~,I,I  ,O$,.                  ~ =I:  ~DI. 8DD?        .MM~          D,                     8M         8
                   ,,,.          DM                      =7D D~I~O                    ~:.7$?7$,  ~?8:?,    .?8   ,~  .  .  = I$?$. ~8:  7. 8 :?:     ,MD           M$                      DM          8
                               ~M                       ?I, I  777I      :,     ?:I?~ $I$?    ,I,~.?,~I~~      ~II$?   ~,~, :  7I?    ?~~~~M,=I   ?MMI          .8M:                      M~           8
                              MO                   :I,    ,,D$,~   ~8DI~~,. ..:~..,$8$    8 ? 7 .~~?,  ~O~          .~?7IO$8I:     . ,?,  MM    IM7  ,        ~MM8, O=                 ,MM             8
                          7$I                           ?7=   O , ~I                :I:?~O  .~D~:?~II,,.I      =O   II~ ?, =~7I??~:  =$?  DMOMD     ~$    7M7       ?7I,$            OM                8
                                      ,~.,,~ .=~MMMMMM8?   I   DMO=,~?           7I?   .  D7, I,  == =::          ,I?~787$$I:,~I8$I=.~ ~ =MD$      ,~$  $M7           ,  I         .M~                 8
                                 78DD$$$7~               .~?MMMI D     ~7ODDDO88, ,IOD~   :=,$,:   7~=   ~$=    I                7 ??=.78MDM,,~       MM?                        IMM                   8
                          ?8MMI,                               IMMMM8 ?            ~ =I~ .D? =..    8=I7,?   ==   .7 ~$~:I O   =8 $   .87MM.~:~,   7MM                          MM                     8
              ==$$$D8OI=,                                ??~.      =8MDD8   :?. : ,?8$  ~,= $$D88I  ~ :I.  =~    =~I.     ,      787,  =DM=  =,  IM~                          $M                       8
                                                   ==?O=I             =MMMOIOOO$87=,,=ODMMMDI~~~8MMMM$:  .~$=         ,~:~~=~O ~? I = I MO 7., MM?                           MM,                       8
                                                           .,~7?=,::II   MM8.I$8DDDDDDO,   ~I,.,?= 8?.$M$ ,  :O8$~,     : 7 ?:I, =   D7OM. $ 7M                            MM                          8
                                                         =$7               MM          :$~          ,MO IMM8= 7= : IODDO7I7   $$DDO~, OM,   M,                           $M~                           8
                                                                 ,  =?===   8MD           I?           D~==I?OD= ?I $. $ .II   ,= ~~:MM8 ,MO ,7?                      =MM7                             8
                                                                           ~  8M             .           O $OI  .DMMI?~ ,~?MMMM88MMMMMMDMM?  I .?,                   M$                                8
                                                                                M$           .            ~I?I=~     7MM~               7= ?I   7,                 MM=                                 8
                                                                         ~,~    ~MM                           :   ~I?                     O, O~   ,              =M.                                   8
                                                                  ~:..==I$7~.77,  7O                           II:7:                       ~  =                 MO                                     8
                                                                            .~  7=$$M            .??            I.:                         7  7              DM                                       8
                              :                                                    ODM                .       :7 =                                          MM.                                        8
                              $.                                                     ,MM$                                                                 ~M:                                          8
                               7,                                                       $MM7.                   .                                        MM.                                           8
                                7   ~                                                     .8MM7                 =                                      DM~                                             8
                                 D  O.                                                        OMM~                                                   $MM7                                              8
                                  77  I8:                                                       ?MMM                                              ~M ,M.                                               8
                             .      I   =                          ..,                             ,MM$                                            :MM                                                 8
                          I87,=,~   .M7   =$~~.                   .  ,~.~,                      77== ,8MD~                                ~=     =MD=                                                  8
          MMMMMMDO7~    :  ==.IM7      D    :                                                        ,=DMMMMM$                        ?8O??DDMMMMO                                                     8
                 ?$DMMMDI.   ,?$?   ~$7~.MM  I                                                  7           .?MMMO~              ~MMMMMDI~~.                                                           8
                       $MMMMD7           ,=MMD ?O?                ~                          ~7                  IDMMD?     ?DMMMO                                                                     8
                           ,~OMMMO=           DMD= :.I~           ~~?=                       ~ 7                    ,$MM88MM8~                                                                         8
                                 ODMMMDI.        ?MM$   ..            ,=?                 ?.I =~                        MMD                                                                            8
                                     ~7DMMMMO=       $MMM8I~                              ~~?:I           =               IM                                                                           8
                                            :$MMMM7~       ,$OMMMMMMMDI~                   7 7               =MMMMMMM8=    IM7                                                                         8
                                                  :=IMMMMMMDI=        .=$MMM,             :I =           =  DM          DM$ :M                                                                         8
                                                          ..OOMMMMMMMMDD7I~ =MMD8?       . 8             = ~8            I~  ?~                                                                        8
                                                                       ..  .. . ,I8MMM~, = ==           I= 8? :        ? 8    ?                                                                        8
                                                                                      7MMMM7$           =  D~ ,        $??    ?                                                                        8
                                                                                           ~7MMMMO?,       $? :         8~   7                                                                         8
                                                                                                  ,?MMMMMD=:MM        ~7$   ~M                                                                         8
                                                                                                          ,?7DMMM7~   .=8: MD                                                                          8
                                                                                                                 ,=$MMM8DMM,                                                                           8
                                                                                                                                                                                                       8

(

mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:12, archived)

gracious

(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:19, archived)

When ever I see a penis, I instantly compare it to my own in terms of size, in order to see if I'm average or not.
But I can't do that with this one because I haven't shaved my pubes. Could you please do a copy of this picture with pubes so I can see if I'm over/under/average compared to Mike's ASCII cock ? Would you say that person has average sized hand?
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:39, archived)

I'd say it was quicker for you to shave your pubes, Gonz

(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:51, archived)

But I got a feeling I might have some sex this saturday and if I shave now it'll be itchy by then.
But I suppose at least she'll be able to find it.
(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:59, archived)

that was nifty, there
have a shave on friday, and moisturise. Word to the wise.
(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:10, archived)

I was gonna set about doing this but the football's on.
If you'll wait two hours, I'll have one done.
(

mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:54, archived)

Chers man, no worries, I can wait.

(

Pops the putz. Most hurt actor? bruise WIll is., Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:58, archived)

I totally replied in the second half

(

mr_horrible now has TWO HATS!, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 21:10, archived)

go shove a trifle up your cockend and shit out the custard.

(

mark morrisons prison shoes shmurvegording so you don't have to, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:22, archived)

hahaha
lol
(

broadsword cold get ill or get retarded, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:29, archived)

I don't get it.

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:40, archived)

Now would be the perfect time to start a tribute band called 'The BaldMonkees'.
If you had any talent.
(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:55, archived)

You could call your first song 'gaydream believer'

(

2 Can Chunder Join Team b3ta, World Community Grid, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 19:59, archived)

I got a delivery from BMW today
and it seems I've paid 12 quid for a fucking rubber ring that I don't even need, because I got two numbers the wrong way round on the order form.

What useless junk have you forked out for recently?
(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:27, archived)

the fucking big issue
what a load of bollocks
(

rosalicious . just found a bit of sauce on my face, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:29, archived)

it's gone up a lot lately,
it was a quid for ages.
(

Moon Girl Technologies fuck off Team GB, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:30, archived)

2.50
i thought id give it a go and its full of fucking adverts. its like a skinny marie claire
(

rosalicious . just found a bit of sauce on my face, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:31, archived)

you'd be fucking skinny too if you were homeless

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:34, archived)

oh well at least you can go swimming now

(

Moon Girl Technologies fuck off Team GB, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:29, archived)

if only I had a 2" waist

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:33, archived)

I forked out for this holiday but then forgot to travel first class so it was shit.

(

mike woz ere 7442200 getter, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:32, archived)

this is a surreptitious dig at someone, isn't it

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:38, archived)

Never mind that, Davy Jones is dead.

(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:36, archived)

crack on granddad
www.b3ta.com/talk/7458144
(

rosalicious . just found a bit of sauce on my face, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:37, archived)

Good work Rose.

(

djrich - Live from Houghton Regis, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:39, archived)

they'll have to cross his name off the roster with Tippex

(

Grrrmachine is angostic, which explains the bitterness, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:38, archived)

sleeps with the fishes etc

(

spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:40, archived)

I didn't believe he was dead, but then I saw his face :(
(

Amorous Badger NINE MORE YEARS, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:44, archived)

LOOKS LIKE HE MUST HAVE MONKEELED OVER
AND DIED
(GluEid Saeed, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 20:50, archived)

Similarly i bought a new gear lever top,
Bastard thing doesn't fit. Fucking owners club lying cunts.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:44, archived)

yeah
apparently The Jeremy Kyle show is sponsored by foxy bingo]

although I don't feel we loyal viewers are reminded of this enough

also - I am a daytime tv viewer and need a pay day loan, I also wish to play bingo online and believe myself to have been mis sold payment protection insurance and have had an accident in the workplace and am entitled to compensation although there is LITTLE or NO information of any services or busineses that can help with any of my aforementioned maladies!
(

SickRik float like a camembert sting like a brie, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 16:36, archived)

Marmaladies more like.

(

Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 16:39, archived)

i LIKE this

(

manolith - modomite, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 16:44, archived)

popular page already?
There's only 3 of us here, wtf?
Lurkers best start contributing or they're going to have nothing to click soon.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 16:58, archived)

It's very clever code that recognises comic excellence.

(

Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:00, archived)

I keep reading your name as Leaky Pig

(GluEid Saeed, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:00, archived)

I have many flaws gluey,
Luckily for me, incontinence is not one of them.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:06, archived)

If you've got incontinence problems I feel bad for your bum,
I've got 99 problem but the squits ain't one.
(

Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:16, archived)

Terrible abuse of mod powers

(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:02, archived)

yesssss

(GluEid Saeed, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 16:58, archived)

I'm totally imagining you saying this in a spot light in front of a brick wall

(GluEid Saeed, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 16:56, archived)

does he have a bag over his head?

(

Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 16:59, archived)

it's a sort of orange netting

(GluEid Saeed, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:02, archived)

I see what you've done here,
and I have to tell you, its not great.
(

Windy Pig Piggily Wiggily Woo, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 16:56, archived)

Someone told me you're an orange spastic
But don't shoot the messenger
(

Two Hats is AS funny as Michael McIntyre and Stewart Lee, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:00, archived)

In this case the messenger should be thanked,
and possibly given a small cake as a reward.
(

Mr. Tea burying dead greyhounds without a licence since, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:22, archived)

fuck all that davy jones is dead
i cant even remember if he was fit or not
(

rosalicious . just found a bit of sauce on my face, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 18:11, archived)

« Older messages | Newer messages »