Woke up with a hangover
So I had a pint of water, 2 aspirin, and a cup of herbal detox tea.

Then I cracked one out and went up the road for a Full English.

I feel somewhat better now, I reckon it was the breakfast.

How are we all? What have we got planned for today? What's your hangover cure?
( The Light in Chains Utterly Custard Groovy, Sat 28 Jan 2012, 12:07, 64 replies, latest was 2 minutes ago)

Once again, another Friday night wish I was out but I'm not that's made me do a sad :'( thread
SHOW YOUR LINKS

www.youtube.com/watch?v=0S43IwBF0uM&ob=av3e

www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGpkNPbSa2Q
( mark morrisons prison shoes fruit salad fusilier, Fri 27 Jan 2012, 19:25, 53 replies, latest was 17 hours ago)

my gosh
I've just had a horrid first (and last) date with a man.

What have you had? (If you say 9" I will come to your house and kill you)
(Catomiagi is in with a chance, Fri 27 Jan 2012, 19:23, 8 replies, latest was 20 hours ago)

Screw you guys.
I'm going home.

FFOOW
( Dr. Shambolic a blithering asshole, Fri 27 Jan 2012, 14:57, 154 replies, latest was 22 hours ago)

Bueller? Anyone? Anyone?
Has offtopic shut down(s) for the afternoon?

How are you going to procrastinate away your Friday afternoon?


Alt:
The perfect Saturday morning
( sportscow Fun loving wacky North East uncle, Fri 27 Jan 2012, 13:12, 150 replies, latest was 1 day ago)

New thread.
Something about Honda Accords and MD's?

Did you ever do an exchange trip when you were at school?

Dayum, yo momma sho'is ugly!

I'm a karate man. I bruise on the inside.
(Set your faces to stunned. fo shizzle, Fri 27 Jan 2012, 11:45, 93 replies, latest was 1 day ago)

I'm going
To a cider festival this weekend. What are you doing?

Alt; Is your boss a cunt?
(JeffTheDogFucker is not a black dude with natty dreads., Fri 27 Jan 2012, 7:53, 318 replies, latest was 1 day ago)

For cock's sake.
New thread, right here. VALIDATE ME!
(DOZ-One Colossal Ponce, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 20:43, 99 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

SLEEP!
Why can't I get enough of it?

What's the best thing about sleeping? What makes you sleep? Is it boring threads that are thinly veiled attempts to start an evening natter? Yeah, I used the word 'natter' and I'm not Jeff, what you gonna do about it?

alt: My wishlist = Sleep, teleporter, sex. Yours?
( Captain 'artbitch' Cavy looking like an erotic vulture, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 18:14, 35 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

ROMANS!!!! COUNTRYMEN!!!!!!
Do you like hip hop? If you do, this is the biggest thing to happen in the UK in several years:
psykhomantus.blogspot.com/2012/01/juice-crew-allstars-comes-to-uk.html
( Monty_Boyce "I'm the hardest man on the island.", Thu 26 Jan 2012, 15:28, 177 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

FRIENDS!!!
Who has IRL besties? How and when did you meet? Why do you get on so well?

Only springs to mind as I had a lovely long chat with my bestie in New Zealand last night. It cheered me right up.
( big-girl's-blouse is feeling funky but not in a good way, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 14:11, 139 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

So. Work?
So do you have a job or a vocation? Are nurses sexy?

Should tube drivers earn £66k a year?

My bum's warm.

Stop staring at my crotch!!
(Set your faces to stunned. fo shizzle, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:28, 211 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

work eh?
whats that all about?
(Quinten Oftiweak giving away clicks by request, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 12:26, 13 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

G'day Off Topickers
Vote for the new Question of the Week: HERE

As you were.
( Scaryduck - twitter.com/scaryduck, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 11:30, 19 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

pubs
what makes a good pub? which is your favourite pub/bar and why?

alt: most entertaining spat/meltdown on b3ta EVER?? bonus points for links.

alt alt: white or brown bread?
( rachelswipe cock fairy, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 9:58, 273 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

Morning all
I am out and about early as I was supposed to meet some workmen at 8 at my old place. But they're not here yet.

Tell me about unreliable tradesmen.

Alt: wotchadoin?
( The Light in Chains Utterly Custard Groovy, Thu 26 Jan 2012, 8:11, 186 replies, latest was 2 days ago)

Yay! Friday.
Let's all sing the Yay! Friday! song.

You start.
( Dr. Shambolic a blithering asshole, Wed 25 Jan 2012, 19:26, 210 replies, latest was 3 days ago)

Last thread of the day
Everyone has been very middle class on here recently, but what makes you a pikey? do you have a burnt out mattress in your front garden? Is your 'tea' sometimes made up of entirely ornage and biege foods? Are you from the North?

alt: plants are shit, the whole earth is covered in them, but put one in your garden and it'll die unless you smear fois gras on it's leaves and perform the third act from Aida for it everynight. Do you have green fingers?
(Naked_Ape a sugar coated piece of shit, Wed 25 Jan 2012, 16:43, 156 replies, latest was 3 days ago)

So anyway, exciting as coat thread is...
It seems that Professor David Nutt can talk nothing but sense. I, for one, would like to hereby self-diagnose myself with a crippling depression that can only be cured by NHS 'shrooms.
www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/jan/23/magic-mushrooms-psilocybin-depression-drug
Can anyone think of a better cure?

Alt: One for the fatties: best magic mushroom recipes.
( tangledupinblue Nothing, like something, happens anywhere, Wed 25 Jan 2012, 14:19, 173 replies, latest was 3 days ago)

New Thread Time
I often find my brain drifts off normally while talking to dull people. You know the sort of how far is the nearest star daydream type things.

However last night I became somewhat distracted and realised I had been wondering how many dairy farmers get caught trying to wank with a milking machine each year? I mean it has to be quite a few but you never hear of it.

What do you day dream of?

Alt, Spuds or Scuds
(Bonzodog29 A frood who really knows where his towel is, Wed 25 Jan 2012, 12:17, 164 replies, latest was 3 days ago)

Right.
It's Burns Night tonight.

Do you give a fuck? Do you or anyone you know actually celebrate it?

My grandfather's life's work was this: www.amazon.co.uk/Poems-Songs-Robert-Burns-volumes/dp/0198118430*
He really fucking loved Robert Burns. But do you? Personally I find him to be fucking shit.

*nice to see that the 1st edition my mother has is worth £350. That's 'going missing' next time I visit fo' sho'.
( Monty_Boyce "I'm the hardest man on the island.", Wed 25 Jan 2012, 10:29, 151 replies, latest was 3 days ago)

So the Ruskies are putting webcams in every polling station
and will record the public voting and then record the count to try to prevent fraud.

So do you think this is a good thing? Would you like to be recorded while you're making your vote?
(PsychoChomp Considers this a race hate crime against me., Wed 25 Jan 2012, 8:58, 133 replies, latest was 3 days ago)

So.
Suddenly everyone's taking the piss out of my "Alt:"
Won't anyone think of the kudos? I ask you.

Alt: Any gymnasts/ex-gymnasts who used to be able to/still can suck themselves off?
Does your cum taste different to others?
(ringofyre WOW! That was so puerile. Nice & cathartic., Wed 25 Jan 2012, 6:32, 38 replies, latest was 3 days ago)

What the fuck as been going on here today?
alt: What the fuck has been going on with you today?
( Captain 'artbitch' Cavy looking like an erotic vulture, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 18:01, 213 replies, latest was 4 days ago)

What are you having for lunch?
alt: lunch

altalt: Supper

altaltalt: Some papers are suggesting Boris could run for number 10, but who do you think woould make a great or comedic PM and why?

altaltaltalt: would you rather be a spastic or a retard?
(Naked_Ape a sugar coated piece of shit, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 14:14, 18 replies, latest was 4 days ago)

The man who invented Pickles has been promoting a change in drugs policy
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-16697637

if you could stand before parliament and lobby for a change in the law or wotevs, what would you do?

alt: Some papers are suggesting Boris could run for number 10, but who do you think woould make a great or comedic PM and why?
(Quinten Oftiweak giving away clicks by request, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 14:14, 205 replies, latest was 4 days ago)

Conking out thread
If you could buy one thing in the world, what would it be and why?

Alt:
Lunch anyone? I'm not buying
( sportscow Fun loving wacky North East uncle, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 12:22, 178 replies, latest was 4 days ago)

SANDWICH RETAILERS!!!!!
Not really.


Ever been in a fight? Did you win? I've been assaulted once or twice but never had a 'fight'. Who do you think I am, Noel or something?
( Monty_Boyce "I'm the hardest man on the island.", Tue 24 Jan 2012, 10:54, 133 replies, latest was 4 days ago)

Home-made sour dough bread and home-made fig jam.
I win middle class breakfast of the day.
( Dr. Shambolic a blithering asshole, Tue 24 Jan 2012, 7:38, 257 replies, latest was 4 days ago)

I'm gonna ring-a-rang-a-dong for a new thread!
I'm having a look at holiday, something before the end of March (maybe).

No idea if I want a week in the sun reading books, or going out looking at 'stuff'.

Where would you go?
(JeffTheDogFucker is not a black dude with natty dreads., Mon 23 Jan 2012, 21:15, 83 replies, latest was 5 days ago)